We’ve all heard the basics around body image in the summertime…..you put on your swimsuit & try to get into the moment despite how you feel. And yet as you think about those words, those influencers, and those blogs you’ve read about this the past, you can’t help but to feel discouraged or want to roll your eyes. Because at the end of the day, you know all of those basics. And yet, you still feel so bothered by the thought of your “perfectly imperfect” body in your swim suit, in public. Especially if you live in an area where it seems like everyone looks like they spend their free time perfecting their outfits, their bodies, and the illusion of fun in the sun.
I hear you. The struggle is real. And the hits just keep on coming because your internal self dialogue has not changed much even though you “know” all the right things. The funny thing is that gap between what we “know” and what we “feel” is like a huge gap in the grand canyon……the distance between both sides is a huge gap filled with water, sand, and a very slippery slope that once you’ve fallen into, it feel like you can’t climb out.
So while there is definite value in the blogs, tips, and ideas about coping with body image, I thought we’d try on a different approach this summer. Instead of focusing on your swim suit, I think it’s time to focus on your body, but not in the way you think. When I say your body, I mean the things that help you regulate your body, which impacts your mood & your belief states.
How a Body Image Therapist Might Explain the Emotional Loop You're Stuck In
Simply put, emotions love themselves, so the more we are feeling of one particular emotion, belief, or judgement- our brain comes up with more data that is on that same thought/mood train. So if you are feeling happy, your brain will notice things in the present, past, and project into the future about happy things. If your brain is frustrated with your body, your friends, or your family members, then it will continue to notice frustrations about those things and other things in your environment that are frustrations. This isn’t a character issue, it’s just biology. So before you meet up at any summertime event that requires a swim suit or might challenge your body image, let’s run through a check list of things you can do to set up your biology.
While an ideal thought it to never have any negative body image thoughts enter your mind, it is unlikely that this is realistic. Our brains are hardwired to set off alerts to safety, which includes real or imagined safety cues to our physical or social settings. So of course our brains scanning all environments on some level looking for safety & connection as well a potential threats or disconnection. And we live in a culture where bodies can be talked bout in ways that idealize certain features or behaviors, so even if you don’t buy into them fully, it doesn't mean that your body will feel safe in those settings without some proactive care.
What Body Image Counseling in Utah Might Help You Notice About Feeling Unsafe in Safe Places
Our nervous system, our past experiences, and our biological status all impact how we feel about the world around us & ourselves. An easy example of this is often how we feel in the dark or if we are alone. If you typically feel really safe in your home, but you happen to be home alone- you may often notice having an increased awareness of sounds or other nuanced things you believe you don’t hear when you are home with others. This sensitivity tends to cue up onto high alert when it gets dark outside and or the lights are turned off within your home and you are alone. Now this may not be the case for everyone or for you if you have lived alone for a window of time and your nervous system has acclimated (or your generally don’t experience much anxiety or high awareness of your environment).
But for the rest of us IYKYK. But regardless, I think everyone has had a time or two when they have been spooked or have come up with a really scary internal narrative or feeling when they are in the dark, alone, or in an uncertain setting no matter the cause, our nervous system responds from a more fear based space, vs a place of calm. So if you’ve had this experience, you know that when it’s daytime, or the lights are on (literally or proverbially) or you are with someone who makes you feel safe, random or minor threats are just that-minor or non-existent. So let’s look at ways you can support your nervous system, recruit support from others, and identify where you are in the “grand canyon gap” between logic & feelings.
Here are 3 Steps to try this summer:
Step 1: Care for your inner 3 year old
Three year olds are the perfect example of unfiltered emotions. They are adorable, joyfilled, fearful, over-tired, and hangry all rolled into one. The emotion center of their brains are fully developed but their language skills & coping tools are just beginning to form. Any adult, or even teen babysitter knows that everything goes better when their basic needs are attended to with a pre-emptive strike if you will. They can regulate their mood so much better when they are:
Have meals & snacks on hand & eaten before they start to get over hungry
They are well hydrated & temperature regulated- we bring shade, fans, cooling towels, etc in order to help them literally & figuratively keep their cool
We make sure they take some breaks to rest- from swimming, from playing, from getting over-tired.
Sleep or Illness- we know that if they have good sleep before any big event, that they do SO much better than if they are over-tired or don’t feel good. And if either of those factors are off, we need to increase support or make adjustments or add more patience to the equation.
To be honest, we are not that much different than they are, except that we can use our words better:). And hopefully, we can attempt to care as well for ourselves as we would for them.
Step 2: Set Up a Plan for Support
When we are in new, scary, or challenging circumstances (even a familiar house in the dark), we do so much better with support. Our brains are highly creative & very convincing that scary things are bound to happen when we are in things alone. Even when we “know” that we are technically safe. So having a few people know that you are about to come up against a body image challenging moment/day is very wise & an excellent way to care for yourself. Here are a few questions to address within yourself & then talk to a friend about as you head into these events:
Who can you text if you start to get into the comparison or self-criticism loop? What do you need them to say to you that will make you feel supported? Will you be feeling more anxiety or shame-and how can you tell them which emotion is coming up & what response helps you feel more settled depending on those feelings.
Step 3: Where are you- in your logic, in your emotion, or the land in between?
I’m in logic
If I think this is true-then is my inner 3 yo’s needs met or is it possible my mood feels off for one of those reasons?
I’m in full blown emotion
I’m on the slippery slope or the land in between
Learning to regulate our emotions & enjoy time in the sun is more of a journey than a destination. Our relationship with our emotions & our bodies are just that- a relationship. And relationships are about learning, connecting, patience, compassion and lots of TLC. Learning to befriend ourselves, even if we are upset with our bodies is still the path that leads us to greater connection & joy.
Ready to Build a Better Relationship With Your Body Through Body Image Counseling in Utah?
You don’t need to “fix” your body to feel better this summer—you just need support that honors the complexity of what you’re feeling. If you find yourself stuck in the gap between what you know and what you feel, you’re not alone. Whether you’re dreading swimsuit season, navigating the constant loop of comparison, or trying to reconnect with your body in a culture that makes that hard, body image counseling in Utah can help. Your emotions, nervous system, and sense of safety matter—and we’re here to help you care for all of them.
At Inside Wellness, we specialize in compassionate, evidence-based care that helps you regulate emotions, challenge perfectionism, and show up more fully in your life. It’s not about getting it perfect—it’s about finding peace in the process. Here’s how to begin:
Book a free consultation or contact us at 801-699-6161
Meet with a skilled, supportive therapist who understands the mind-body connection
Start showing up for yourself with more kindness, calm, and confidence—this summer and beyond!
Other Services Inside Wellness Offers in Provo and Salt Lake City, UT
Body image struggles don’t magically disappear just because it’s summer—and neither does the pressure to feel good all the time. At Inside Wellness, we offer more than just eating disorder treatment, and body image therapy. We provide support for anxiety perfectionism, and nervous system regulation, all through a compassionate, whole-person approach. Whether you're feeling overwhelmed by social settings, stuck in self-comparison, or just trying to bridge the gap between what you know and what you feel, we’re here to walk alongside you. Visit our blog or FAQ to learn more about how therapy can help you show up for yourself this season—with less pressure and more self-trust.