Congratulations on moving on to grad school!
You’re no stranger to hard work to have gotten where you are today, and naturally you have your sights trained on achieving personal and professional excellence.
If you’re reading this article, though, you already know that there can be a darker side to striving for excellence. Maintaining mental balance while constantly trying to be noticed, to stand out, and to be the best can be tricky at. At Wildflower Therapy our skilled team of Therapists understand these challenges!
Perfectionism
Many graduate students suffer from perfectionism and high-functioning anxiety without even knowing there is a name for what they’re battling.
Perfectionism has been described as setting high standards and striving for flawlessness while also being highly self-critical. Does this sound like you?
High Functioning Anxiety
Perfectionism often goes hand-in-hand with high-functioning anxiety. Although high-functioning anxiety is not currently a recognized mental health diagnosis, it generally refers to people who live with anxiety but also function reasonably well in other aspects of their life.
Individuals who struggle with high-functioning anxiety often notice that their anxiety propels them forward rather than leaving them frozen in fear. On the surface, you may also appear to be successful, calm, and focused—the type of person who generally excels at work and life. However, that outer veneer may be very different to how you actually feel on the inside.
The Trade-Off
Perfectionism and high-functioning anxiety can rob you of inner peace and mental and emotional balance. Although they may propel you forward in your chosen career, they will eventually exact payment for their services, in the form of lost relationships, extreme stress, and dangerous mistakes. They can also cause physical changes, such as insomnia, eating and appetite changes, as well as a whole host of other issues.
Managing Perfectionism
It’s worth the effort to regain mental and emotional balance. Here are five tips to help you manage perfectionism:
1 - Practice self-acknowledgment and self-praise.
So much of perfectionism involves pushing for More, Better, without taking any time to acknowledge the accomplishments you’ve had or the effort you’ve put in. Next time you accomplish something, no matter how small, take a minute to say ‘Well done’ or ‘I did well with that’ to yourself.
2 - Set realistic goals.
Big goals are great, but it can be demoralizing to constantly be striving for a big goal that will be out of reach for years. Set the big goals, but then work backwards and set the mid- and short-term goals that build on each other and lead you to that bigger end goal. Setting and reaching goals has been shown to improve well-being and fuel future efforts.
3 - Acknowledge your strengths.
Western culture tends to focus on individual weaknesses and failings while glorifying other people’s successes and strengths. In reality, we are all a mixture of strengths and weaknesses. Don’t allow your weaknesses to drown out your attention.
Make a list of your strengths and then look for these in your efforts; you will likely start noticing them constantly as your strengths are what you use daily to be the best you can be. Acknowledge them and be grateful for them.
4 - Challenge your unhealthy thoughts.
While thoughts may seem to appear, unbidden, in our heads, they can be controlled and changed over time. When you have a thought that exhausts you or makes you feel bad, challenge it. Ask yourself, ‘Is this thought balanced?’ ‘Is it true or is it just my perception?’ ‘What would be a healthier way to think about this?’ Our brains are flexible and plastic, able to change and grow. With or without help, you CAN change your thoughts.
5 - Be gentle with yourself.
Graduate school is not easy; you fought to get here. Staying here and thriving is not just about hard work and focus; it’s important to care for your body and mind so they are able to continue supporting you as you work towards your dreams.
Take time to do something you enjoy, go for a walk in nature, listen to music, practice mindfulness, have lunch with a friend, watch a funny movie. Give your body even these short, restorative sessions and it will be able to give you the strength you need to achieve your goals.
Asking for Help: The Benefits of Therapy for Perfectionism and High-Functioning Anxiety Treatment
If you still find yourself struggling to regain your mental balance, don’t be afraid to reach out for extra support. Enlisting the help and guidance of a qualified mental health therapist can give you the boost you need to regain your balance.
Seeking help is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of strength to recognize you have a need and to ask for help with it. This is a strength that will continue to serve you as you finish school and move into your chosen profession. Perfection may not be attainable, but good, and even great, are possible. Especially if you allow others to help lift you higher than you could climb alone.
Begin Therapy for Perfectionism in Utah
Seeking high-functioning anxiety treatment can be the first step to being successful not only in school but also in life. Therapy for students in Utah is available with our team of well-trained counselors! Follow the steps below to get connected with someone who can help you successfully navigate the pressures and expectations of graduate school.
If you're ready to get started, you can follow these simple steps:
Reach out to us about scheduling a free 15-minute phone consultation.
Learn more about our counseling services and the members of our team.
Get set up with a counselor who is right for you!
Additional Services Offered at Inside Wellness
Schedule a call today with our Care Coordinator, who will work with you to find the right therapist match for you.