When you look in the mirror, you feel sad and disgusted. A series of negative thoughts run through your head and you worry about leaving your house looking this way. You decide to change your outfit for the 3rd time this morning, but as you’re standing there looking at your clothes you start to feel frustrated. You want to feel confident and think about your body less. You’re tired of negative body image disrupting your life, and you start to think about what you could do to improve your body image...
Body image is the perception we have of our body, which includes how we see, feel, think, and behave in it. It’s a hot topic these days, but one that is still surrounded by misinformation. For example, It’s not uncommon to see social media posts about weight loss promising better body image if you can follow this diet and exercise routine, or you might encounter a positive body image campaign showcasing people of different shapes, sizes, and colors, but the focus is still on loving the way your body looks. While I would not group positive body image campaigns and media selling diets to improve body image into the same category, my overall point is, both are misguided.
Positive body image is about accepting and loving your body for what it does for you. It’s knowing that your body is good and how it looks is only part of the equation. In fact, people who genuinely experience positive body image tend to spend very little time thinking about the way their body looks. But when they do think about appearance, they have the ability to see their body as it truly is, accepting their genetics, including shape and size. On the other hand, those who experience negative body image often have distortions in the way they view their body. They may believe they are flawed and focus on certain aspects of their body they do not like. Those with negative body image are at an increased risk of suffering from depression, comparisons to others, low self-worth, and eating disorders. Body image is part of our mental health, and not a sign of vanity. And like all mental health concerns, suggesting someone “get over it” or “just be more positive” are not helpful sentiments. While building a positive body image can be a complicated process, here are some ideas to get you started.
Identify underlying feelings- As mentioned above, body image is part of our mental health. Often when we’re experiencing negative body image it’s actually about something else. So if you find yourself thinking negative things about your body, stop and assess what you’re feeling underneath, and then attend to that emotion. For example, if you notice you’re feeling sad, talking to someone about why you’re sad is much more likely to help the situation than attempting to change your body in some way.
Love your body for what it does- Our bodies are amazing, and we tend to take that for granted. Every moment our body is working hard for us, and we would not be able to do ANY of the things we love without it. So next time you’re out doing your favorite activity, or spending time with people you love, stop to consider all that your body is doing to make that possible. In fact, it can be helpful to pause and think about this a few times each day. As we practice appreciating our body, our body image can improve.
Question media- Most of the images we see in media are edited. Even when we’re scrolling through instagram we’re seeing pictures with filters over them. Sometimes advertising or even our friends posts can make us feel like our bodies should look a certain way. But it’s important to remember that what we’re seeing in the media often isn’t the reality. And when it comes to advertising, they’re trying to sell us something. It’s their job to make us feel like we NEED that beauty product, diet pill, or pair of jeans. Plus, we know only about 1% of the population naturally have the body type that most models in advertising have. For 99% of us, that’s an unrealistic body standard.
Say no to diet culture- Dieting is a slippery slope that often leads to poor body image. Dieting essentially tells us that we’ll feel good about our bodies when they look a certain way. How many times have you seen before and after pictures where the person looks sad and tired in the before, but happy and full of life in the second? It can be pretty enticing, but the reality is this isn’t a long term fix for body image. And there are a few reasons for that. One, about 98% of diets fail, and when they do, people tend to feel a sense of failure. This can heavily impact any improvement in body image they were temporarily feeling. Second, some people may diet but see no changes in weight or body shape. This too can be frustrating and create feelings of failure, although neither of these scenarios are failures on the person’s part. Dieting just doesn’t work. And lastly, body image is related to how we feel about ourselves and underlying concerns we have. So while someone may feel increased confidence after losing weight, it’s not likely to have a lasting effect.
Avoid comparisons- First let me say, this is a lot easier said than done. It’s a practice that takes time and patience. Anytime you find yourself comparing to another person, notice what you’re doing and attempt to draw you attention elsewhere. Comparisons tend to make us feel bad about ourselves, and they take away from the other person as well. It’s best if we can stay away.
While some may find these tips helpful to start building or improving positive body image, others may not. Body Image is complex and can be linked with other mental health concerns. If you feel you are struggling with negative body image that is impacting your life, therapy can truly help.
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