According to Brene Brown, a brilliant social worker and shame-researcher, “shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance or belonging.” It can be crippling and cause us to feel self-loathing, loneliness, and despair. When we’re stuck in shame, we generally don’t feel motivated to make changes, but instead, focus on our many short-comings.
Guilt Gone Wrong
Do you spend hours worrying that you said or did the wrong thing and may have hurt someone’s feelings? Do you obsess over mistakes you made? Do you take responsibility for things outside of your control and feel guilty that you couldn’t do more? Do you agonize over saying no to someone and/or continually agree to do things you don’t want to?
If any of these questions ring true, you might be someone who struggles with excessive guilt.
Is there more to rest than guilt?
When you think about taking a moment to rest, you feel guilty and worry that you might be lazy. There are better ways to spend your time, and honestly, you have a hard time relaxing anyway. But in the back of your mind, you’re thinking that it might be nice and you’ve been pretty stressed lately. Now you’re caught between two warring sides and unsure what to do. What if you rest, and it’s a waste of time that leaves you feeling worse? But what if you could rest, guilt free, with the knowledge that in some ways, you are being productive?