Social Anxiety in the Summertime: Why Even Outgoing, High-Functioning People Can Struggle

We’ve all heard or felt a bit of the winter time blues when the days grow shorter & we brace for those snowy, cold days.  

But we rarely talk about what it is like for people who start to fear or dread the long days & summer sun because it has become synonymous with social dread &  social anxiety.  You know, the people who RSVP to everything, seem effortlessly charming, always post smiling photos at weddings, BBQs, and beach trips.  But inside they might be holding their breath, running a mental loop of self-doubt, overanalysis, and fear of saying or doing the wrong thing.

What Is Social Anxiety, Really?

When people hear “social anxiety,” they often picture someone painfully shy, maybe awkward, maybe avoiding all social events.

But that’s just one face of it.

Social anxiety is really about the intense fear of being judged, criticized, or rejected in social situations. It’s the chronic worry that you’ll:

• Say something stupid.

• Make a mistake.

• Look “awkward”.

• Be exposed as “not enough” or “too much.”

And here’s the tricky part: you don’t have to look anxious to be anxious.

The Hidden Struggle of High-Functioning Social Anxiety

Some people with social anxiety are actually very social and seem to be good at connecting to others. They often seem very confident, polished, and outgoing on the outside.

But on the inside? They may be suffering from anxiety in many are of their lives, and they typically have an inner critic that is running on overdrive at all times.  Because the anxiety or the inner critic seems to be running hot & fast they are often trying to get ahead of it  its wrath in an attempt to prevent embarrassment or shame. If you could jump inside of their heads you might see something like this:

• They’re rehearsing conversations before they happen, hoping that by rehearsing they will lower the likelihood of saying something that is perceived as “stupid” or wrong

• They’re overanalyzing every word they said after the event, replaying various conversation they had.   Anxiety has a way of putting us way ahead of the data or revisiting what happened on auto replay. But our anxious & critical brain keeps focusing on verbal or non verbal feedback that is in alignment with their fears or topics that cue up shame.

• They’re exhausted from masking their inner nervousness and the fact that most people under estimate or dismiss their struggle due to their external presentation only.

• They constantly fear they’re annoying, boring, or disappointing others, which is often self judgment taking a strong hold or fear of the unknown projecting into the future and telling them a story of “what if’s”. 
  

This is often called high-functioning anxiety — where someone looks like they’re managing life beautifully but is internally driven by a motor of anxiety, perfectionism, and people-pleasing.

Why Is Summer So Tough for Social Anxiety?

Summertime, with its surge of social obligations, vacations, and “fun,” can quietly amplify this struggle. 

• More social invitations: Weddings, parties, family reunions, beach days, concerts — summer is socially packed.
  

• More body exposure: For many, wearing summer clothes (or swimsuits) can trigger intense self-consciousness.

• More comparison: Social media overflows with highlight reels, making people feel like they should be having the “perfect summer” too.
  

• Less downtime: The pressure to keep up, say yes, and stay visible can drain high-functioning anxious people who are already overextended.

Common Beliefs in Social Anxiety

At the root of social anxiety are deep-seated worldviews and self-beliefs, this list is not exclusive nor does it not represent all beliefs or people with social anxiety:

• “I must perform perfectly to be accepted.”
  

• “If I’m not interesting, people will reject me.”
  

• “Any awkwardness or mistake will be remembered forever.”
  

• “Everyone is watching and judging me.”
  

• “I can’t let people down or they’ll stop liking me.”
  

Here’s why these beliefs don’t mix well:

• Perfection is impossible → so they constantly feel like they’re falling short.
  

• Human connection forms best when we can be real & authentic → but they’re trying to mask every flaw.
  

• People are generally focused on themselves, not hyper-analyzing you → but an anxious mind assumes the opposite and tells you that you are under the microscope.

Feeling like you have to have it all together or trying hard to stay out of criticism ( perceived or real) can be exhausting and suck the joy out of the experience.  When this happens to someone, they often leave social events feeling more alone, tense, and emotionally drained than they were before the event. 

So how can you turn this around or support someone who struggles with social anxiety?  Here are a few tips for this summertime struggle: 

5 Tips for Someone with Social Anxiety 

Pause & Check In: Before saying yes to every invite, ask yourself: Do I actually want this, or am I afraid to say no?

Ground Yourself Physically: Before or during events, use grounding techniques — notice your feet on the floor, hold a cool drink, focus on your breath. Anxiety thrives in the mind; grounding anchors you in the body.

Set Time Limits: Give yourself permission to attend part of an event instead of all of it. “I’ll stay for an hour, then leave.”

Challenge Catastrophic Thinking: When you catch yourself overanalyzing (“I sounded so dumb when I said that!”), gently remind yourself: Most people won’t remember, and if they do, they likely don’t care as much as I think.

Schedule Rest Days: Plan “recovery” days between big social events to recharge, especially in a busy season like summer.

4 Tips for Friends & Family: How to Support with Compassion

Don’t Assume They’re Fine Just Because They’re Smiling

Remember, high-functioning anxious people can be pros at appearing to be  okay. Check in gently: “Hey, how are you really feeling about this weekend? Want to talk about it?”

Validate Without Fixing

If they open up about their anxiety, resist the urge to dismiss or fix it (“You’re fine! Everyone loves you!”). Instead, try: “That sounds really hard. I can see how much you’re carrying inside.”

Offer Flexibility

Let them know it’s okay if they need to leave early or skip some plans and that your connection doesn’t depend on constant presence or performance.

Be a Safe Person

Sometimes the most powerful support is just being the friend or family member where they can let down the mask, laugh about the awkward moments, and be messy and real.

If you feel like you struggle with social anxiety, summer time anxiety, or know some one who does.  Please reach out, you don’t have to do it alone.  We are here to offer support & customized tools to help you navigate social situations with more ease.  Reach out for help, 801-699-6161 or insidewellness.com 

Looking for an Anxiety Therapist in Salt Lake and Provo, UT?

Even if you’re the life of the party on the outside, social anxiety can make summertime feel overwhelming. If you find yourself overthinking every interaction or dreading social plans—you're not broken, and you're not alone. Whether it’s managing the pressure to perform, navigating body image concerns, or just needing space to breathe, therapy for anxiety in Salt Lake City, Provo, & throughout Utah can offer a grounded, compassionate place to recalibrate.

At Inside Wellness, we specialize in helping high-functioning individuals manage anxiety, perfectionism, and the hidden emotional load of “keeping it together.” You deserve support that sees beneath the surface. Here’s how to take the next step:

• Book a free consultation or contact us at 801-699-6161

• Meet with a compassionate anxiety therapist who understands your experience

• Start feeling more at ease in your body, your relationships, and your summer with Inside Wellness!

Other Services Inside Wellness Offers in Provo and Salt Lake City, UT

Social anxiety doesn’t take a summer vacation—and neither do we. At Inside Wellness, we offer more than just eating disorder treatment. From therapy for anxiety, perfectionism, and body image to accessible online therapy across Utah, our services are built to support you through the real-life challenges that don’t always show on the outside. Whether you're juggling packed schedules, social expectations, or the pressure to keep smiling when you’re barely holding it together, we’re here to help. Visit our blog or FAQ to learn more about how therapy can support you through every season—including this one.

Do You Take Your Therapy Session on the Road?

The summertime warmth has set in and you are headed on a road trip with your friends and or family.  You are so excited to leave the day-to-day behind you and simply relax.  

You’ve been here before, you are so excited for this break and you are hoping to leave your anxiety behind.  And yet you know that your anxiety tends to be a consistent, persistent, and that annoying side kick that creeps up most when you are faced with uncertainty.  And road trips, vacations, and adventure often include a few with twists & turns or at a minimum other peoples opinions that you cannot predict or plan around.  Cue anxiety just thinking about it, haha-kidding not kidding.  

Before the pandemic & the world going virtual, most people would have bypassed therapy while they were on vacation. And as an anxiety therapist, I can certainly support my clients in taking a break from everything to unplug & be in the moment.  That said, there is definitely an argument for keeping your therapy appointment intact while you are out & about because virtual therapy can be accessible in the majority of the places you may be traveling within Utah.

Many clients have asked about keeping or cancelling their anxiety therapy appointments as we roll into the summertime months, and here is what I typically consider or ask them to consider. 

Things to Consider with Virtual Therapy on the Road:

• Personal preference

  Are you someone who loves to fully unplug from your life in order to re-charge. Does the mere thought of doing anything “normal” while on vacation make you feel cringy or annoyed just thinking about it? If so then feel free to let your provider know.

• What are you addressing in therapy, and what is the degree of difficulty or severity?

  Always consult with your provider about this as well, since anything that is highly distressing or poses a safety risk (depression, eating disorders,etc).  This should be a conversation with your provider because some mental health challenges naturally have a level of minimization or denial as a part of the struggle.  For example, if you want to do a backpacking trip but you are early on in eating disorder treatment, it may not be safe for you to be away from medical services and or an ability to replenish food sources.  Because you’ve been managing your eating disorder for a long time, this may not be obvious to you but your team wants you to be safe, while also living your best life, but in that order:)  

• Length of your trip?

  There could be a significant difference in your needs or stressors if you are gone for 2-3 days vs 2 weeks.  Most people’s travels land somewhere in between which can mean that you likely miss one session, maybe more or maybe less.

• How does your trip support or challenge your struggles?

  If you struggle with family relationships, and you are going on a family vacation- you may feel like having a session midway into the trip could be really helpful.  But if you are having anxiety at work and you will be enjoying a break away from work & said stressors, then it may be less relevant and unnecessary to do a session while you are enjoying your time away.  If you are dealing with mood issues such as anxiety or body image, then the context of the trip would come into play.

  In this situation it may be more nuanced than straight forward, such as what are the activities on the trip and how much may it challenge your mood?  Or who is on the trip and how do they talk about food, body image, and mental health generally speaking? Will they be open to supporting you if your struggle or do you (and your provider) feel like you have enough tools on board to navigate the challenges even if the trip may be challenging-such as a week in your swim suit at Lake Powell.

If You Postpone Your Weekly Session, Here are Few Tips for a Successful Trip:

• Talk to your therapist about a “cope ahead plan”

  Identifying potential triggers or challenges that may show up on the trip and how you can best support yourself or seek the support you may need, including a review of therapy tools that would help. 

• Take inventory of your past trips

  Where have you done well on this type of a trip? Is there a reason or reasons why you feel it went well? Where there tough aspects of the trip that you navigated well, and if so how did you do it? And are there ways where things went south and why?  What didn’t work & why so that you can identify ways to modify skills from the past or outline different tools for this trip

• Trust yourself & the process

  A common phrase I say to my clients who are healing their relationship with food/body image is “not one week can make or break your progress”.  This may not apply to clients in the early stages of eating disorder recovery, but those who are doing well are often most worried about making mistakes or having set backs.  If your therapist and you both feel like it’s appropriate for you to miss one appointment, then trust yourself to navigate the situation well enough or to phone a friend or family member to help you along the way.

• Progress over perfection

  Going on vacation is a great way to add aspects of fun, laughter, play,adventure, and relaxation into your life.  You typically get to connect, make new memories, and often return home feeling like you are now able to take on the challenges of the day-to-day.

If You Keep Your Appointment, Here a Few Things to Keep in Mind:

• A good internet or cellular connection is key

  It can make or break the fluidity of the session.

• Do you have the physical space to have the privacy you need?

  This one may seem obvious but in my experience people will often feel like they are fine doing therapy in the car en route (as the passenger) or in a hotel room with others in the background.  Even if the only people within earshot know you well and you fully trust them, I still find that people tend to be less focused or not as free & open as they typically are in session with full privacy.  

• Do you have the support or safety to do the session?

  Can you step away from the activities and be supported by others for taking time away or be in a location that has physical & emotional safety.  Vacations are often predictable and having a hotel room or parked car (weather permitting) seem to be locations where people seem to open up most. 

• What’s your back-up plan if things need to pivot?

  Make sure you & your provider discuss a back up plan for coping skills in case either of you need to cancel the appointment for any unforeseen reason such as illness, tech issues, and such. You don’t want to be thrown off by feeling like you were going to talk about the trip once you are on the trip.  A tentative outline for support on the trip is always wise & helpful even if you build it out more once you are in motion.

Virtual Therapy Can Make Access & Consistency for Therapy More Do-Able. 

There are many advantages to having support in more real time ways such as travel.  And there  are emotional benefits of unplugging and being present in the moment too.  So check in with yourself to see what you think, talk to your providers to get their input, and then see how it goes.  Unless you are out of cell phone range, most of the time you can change your mind and add in a session or cancel a session depending on your therapist's scheduled & attendance policies.  

So soak up that sun in St. George, take in the grandeur of Zions National Park, or Moab for mountain biking or hiking, or hit up Park City for a relaxing mountain whilst enjoying city trip vibes.  Go and live your best life, knowing your therapy session can come with you or be left behind depending on your needs.

If you feel you need more support with your anxiety, body image, eating disorder or inner critic, give us a call, you don’t have to do it alone. 801-699-6161.

Need Anxiety Treatment in Salt Lake City, Provo & Across Utah?

Travel plans don’t mean you have to hit pause on your healing. Whether you're headed to Lake Powell, Zion, Park City, or just stepping away from your usual routine, you don’t have to choose between vacation and your mental health. With virtual options available throughout the state, anxiety treatment and eating disorder treatment can travel with you. And if you need a break from sessions while away, we’ll help you plan ahead so you feel grounded, supported, and safe.

If you're navigating body image struggles, perfectionism, or anxiety, there’s a team of caring professionals—therapists, dietitians, and physicians—ready to help you stay connected to your values, even on the road. Therapy isn’t just for the hard moments; it’s also a way to protect the joyful ones. Here’s how to stay supported this summer:

• Book a free consultation or contact us at 801-699-6161

• Meet with a caring and experienced therapist who understands eating disorders and anxiety

• Start therapy from anywhere in Utah with Inside Wellness!

Other Services Inside Wellness Offers in Provo and Salt Lake City, UT

At Inside Wellness, we understand that healing doesn’t pause when you pack your bags. That’s why we offer more than just eating disorder treatment—we provide flexible, compassionate mental health support tailored to real life. Whether you're managing anxiety, navigating body image struggles, or just need the continuity of online therapy in Utah, we're here to walk with you. Explore more about our services, or dive into our blog or FAQ to see how therapy can travel with you this summer and beyond.

Can Eating Disorders Be Cured?

Understanding Recovery and What Makes It Possible

As a mental health professional specializing in eating disorders, I hear this question often:
"Can eating disorders really be cured?"

It's a vulnerable and hopeful question — and a complicated one.
The short answer is: Yes, full recovery is possible.
But recovery doesn’t always mean what people initially expect.

Healing from an eating disorder is not about becoming a "perfect eater" or reaching some ideal mental state where you never have a negative thought about food or your body again.
Instead, recovery means reclaiming your life, your freedom, and your sense of self beyond the eating disorder.

In this blog, we'll explore what it means to "fully recover," and the critical factors that make recovery truly possible.

What Does "Cure" Really Mean in the Context of Eating Disorders?

When people ask if eating disorders can be "cured," they often imagine a black-and-white outcome:

• Either you have no lingering thoughts about food or your body (cured),

• Or you continue to struggle forever (not cured).

But in reality, recovery usually looks more nuanced.
Full recovery means:

• You no longer engage in disordered behaviors (restricting, purging, compulsive exercising, bingeing).

• Food no longer dominates your thoughts, emotions, or daily life.

• Body image distress is significantly reduced and no longer controls your choices.

• You have the tools to manage life stress without turning back to the eating disorder.

• You relate to yourself with much greater self-compassion and flexibility.

Full recovery is absolutely achievable.

However, for some people, vulnerable moments might arise — especially during times of stress or major life changes. The difference is that, in recovery, you are equipped to respond rather than relapse. You have coping strategies, support systems, and a deep inner resilience that wasn’t there before.

Recovery is not about perfection.
It’s about freedom.

Factors That Enable Full Recovery from an Eating Disorder

So what makes full recovery possible?
Here are the most critical ingredients:

1. Early Intervention

Research consistently shows that the sooner eating disorder treatment begins, the greater the chance of full recovery.

Eating disorders thrive in secrecy and become more entrenched the longer they go unaddressed. Early intervention interrupts the cycle before it becomes deeply woven into a person's identity and neurobiology.

However — and this is crucial — even people who have lived with an eating disorder for years or decades can still recover. It may take more time, patience, and layered healing, but it is never too late.

2. Comprehensive, Specialized Treatment

General mental health care is rarely enough.
Eating disorders are complex and require specialized treatment that addresses:

• Medical stabilization (if necessary)

• Nutritional rehabilitation

• Cognitive and emotional healing

• Body image work

• Underlying psychological issues (like trauma, perfectionism, anxiety, depression)

Effective eating disorder treatment often includes a multidisciplinary team: eating disorder therapist, dietitian, medical doctor, and sometimes a psychiatrist.
Each professional addresses different aspects of the recovery process, ensuring holistic healing.

3. Addressing Root Causes, Not Just Symptoms

Eating disorders aren't really about food.
Food and body behaviors are symptoms — coping mechanisms for deeper emotional pain, unmet needs, unrealistic self-expectations, anxiety, or unresolved trauma.

Full recovery happens when people are given tools and are better supported in exploring and healing these underlying layers.

Without this deep work, "behavioral recovery" can occur without true emotional freedom — leaving a person vulnerable to relapse.

4. Developing Emotional Regulation Skills

Many people use eating disorder behaviors to manage overwhelming emotions.
Recovery involves learning new emotional regulation skills, such as:

• Identifying and naming feelings

• Self-soothing & nervous system regulation

• Building distress tolerance

• Practicing healthy boundaries

• Learning how to seek support

When emotions no longer feel like emergencies, the need for disordered coping strategies naturally diminishes.

5. Building a New Relationship with the Body

In full recovery, the body is no longer an object to be controlled or punished.
Instead, the body becomes:

• A home

• A partner

• A source of wisdom

Healing body image is a gradual process that often involves:

• Grieving societal ideals and expectations

• Practicing body neutrality (not obsessing over "loving" your body, but respecting it)

• Focusing on what your body can do rather than how it looks

• Unlearning harmful cultural messages about worth and appearance

Body acceptance frees up enormous energy for living a fuller, richer life.

6. Cultivating a Supportive Environment

Recovery does not happen in a vacuum.
Community matters — deeply.

People in recovery thrive when they have:

• Friends, family, or partners who support health at every size, body diversity, and emotional growth

• Therapists and dietitians trained in eating disorder treatment

• Peers or support groups who understand the recovery journey

• Safe spaces free from diet culture pressures

If your environment is steeped in dieting, appearance obsession, or toxic messaging, recovery is not impossible — but it does require stronger boundaries and intentional counter-messaging.

7. Self-Compassion, Patience, and Perseverance

Perhaps the most essential ingredient for full recovery is self-compassion.
Recovery is not linear. There are often setbacks, plateaus, and difficult emotions along the way.

The critical difference between someone who ultimately recovers and someone who stays stuck is not "willpower" — it's the ability to meet themselves with kindness and curiosity when things get hard.

Healing requires patience.
Healing requires grace.
Healing requires a belief that you are worth the effort.

Final Thoughts: Yes, You Can Fully Recover

If you or someone you love is wondering if it's really possible to heal from an eating disorder, hear this clearly:
Yes. Full recovery is possible.
Not because you're "perfect" — but because you are resilient, worthy, and capable of change.

It takes time.
It takes support.
It takes courage to face the pain that fueled the disorder.

But recovery offers you something priceless:

• The ability to eat freely.

• The ability to live in your body without constant self-attack.

• The ability to experience joy, spontaneity, and connection again.

If you're at the beginning of the journey, or feeling discouraged somewhere in the middle, hold on to this truth: There is life beyond the eating disorder. And you deserve to live it.

If you’re ready for support in your recovery journey, reaching out to a specialized eating disorder therapist can be a beautiful and powerful first step. You don’t have to walk this path alone. Give us a call, we are here to help 801-699-6161 or www.insidewellnes.com 

Start Eating Disorder Treatment in Utah

If the thought of swimsuit season brings up anxiety, self-criticism, or shame, you’re not alone. Perfectionism and body image struggles can feel overwhelming—but you are not beyond help. And you are absolutely deserving of care through compassionate, comprehensive eating disorder treatment.

Whether you’ve been silently struggling or just beginning to recognize the signs, you don’t have to face this alone. There’s a team of eating disorder professionals—physicians, therapists, dietitians—ready to support you. Healing isn’t about achieving a “perfect” body. It’s about finding freedom. Here’s how you can get started:

• Book a free consultation or contact us at 801-699-6161

• Meet with a caring and experienced eating disorder therapist

• Start supporting your mental and physical health with Inside Wellness!

Other Services Inside Wellness Offers in Provo and Salt Lake City, UT

Eating disorder treatment is not the only service offered by Inside Wellness. We are happy to provide a variety of other mental health services, including anxiety counseling, body image therapy, and online therapy in Utah. Discover the support and benefits that in-person or online therapy can offer by visiting our blog or FAQ today.

Perfectionism, Body Image, and Swimsuit Season: Coping with the Anxiety of Being Seen

As a mental health professional specializing in eating disorders, body image, and perfectionism, I see a pattern emerge every year as the weather warms up:
Anxiety spikes.
Self-criticism intensifies.
The idea of putting on a swimsuit feels almost unbearable for many.

If you're feeling a wave of dread at the thought of summer and swimsuits, know this: you are not alone, and you are not broken. The intersection of perfectionism and body image challenges can make this season particularly hard, but there are compassionate tools, that you can learn in eating disorder treatment, that can help you cope and even reclaim some joy this summer.

Let’s break it down together.

How Perfectionism Impacts Body Image

Perfectionism is not really about wanting to be "perfect."

At its core, perfectionism is the relentless pursuit of flawlessness, fueled by deep fears of inadequacy, rejection, or unworthiness and an attempt to stay out of shame.

When it comes to body image, perfectionism sounds like:

• “I’ll wear a swimsuit when I lose ___ pounds.”
  

• “I can’t be seen at the pool unless my stomach looks ____________.”
  

• “Everyone will judge me if I have cellulite/stretch marks/scars.”

Perfectionism attaches rigid, impossible standards to how your body should look — standards that no real human body can live up to. And when your body inevitably doesn’t meet these fabricated ideals, it often triggers shame, anxiety, and withdrawal from activities you might otherwise enjoy.

This anxiety can peak during swimsuit season because swimsuits often feel like they "reveal" all the places we’ve been taught to feel shame about. There’s less fabric to hide behind, and perfectionism whispers, "You are not enough."

But the truth? The problem isn’t your body. It’s the unrealistic, perfectionistic standards you’ve absorbed — and you can challenge them.

Why Swimsuit Anxiety Isn't About Vanity

Sometimes people dismiss swimsuit anxiety as “silly” or “vain.”
Let’s be clear: It’s not.

Body image anxiety is deeply connected to basic human needs for acceptance, belonging, and safety. If you have learned that certain bodies are valued more than others — and especially if you have internalized perfectionism — it makes sense that showing your body in public can feel like you're exposing yourself to judgment, exclusion, or criticism.

Swimsuit anxiety isn’t about vanity.
It’s about vulnerability.
It’s about fear.
It’s about wanting to be accepted as you are — and fearing you won't be.

Understanding this deeper emotional layer can actually soften some of the shame you might be feeling. It’s not that you’re being "superficial." It’s that you're human.

Coping Tools: Reclaiming Summer Joy From Perfectionism

The good news is that you don't have to stay trapped in perfectionistic anxiety this summer.
You can take small, compassionate steps to challenge body image perfectionism and feel freer. Here’s how:

1. Shift Your Focus From Appearance to Experience

Perfectionism keeps your mind hyper-focused on how you look to others.
Try this instead: Shift your attention to how you feel and what you experience.

Before you go to the pool, ask yourself:

• What do I want to experience today? (Fun? Connection? Relaxation?)
  

• What memories do I want to create?
  

• How do I want to feel in my body — not look, but feel? (Free? Refreshed? Playful?)

When you root your day in experience, not appearance, you create a new definition of success: joy, connection, and presence, not perfection.

2. Practice "Body Neutrality"

Instead of forcing yourself to love your body in a swimsuit (which can sometimes feel fake or overwhelming), aim for body neutrality.

Body neutrality sounds like:

• "My body lets me swim, play, and laugh today."
  

• "My body doesn’t need to look a certain way to deserve to be here."
  

• "I don’t have to like how I look today to treat myself with kindness."

The goal isn't to love every part of your body all the time — it's to live your life without letting appearance rule you.

3. Use Anxiety Management Tools Before and During Events

Swimsuit anxiety activates your nervous system. Help your body feel safer by using concrete anxiety-reducing techniques:

• Grounding Techniques: Press your feet into the ground. Feel your breath move in and out. Anchor yourself to your body’s strength and presence.
  

• Affirmations: Choose a mantra like, “I deserve to enjoy today,” or, “I am allowed to take up space.” Repeat it as often as you need.
  

• Support System: Attend events with people who value you for who you are, not how you look. Safe, supportive company matters.
  
  

These small but powerful tools signal to your brain: It’s safe to be here. I can tolerate this discomfort.

4. Wear a Swimsuit That Honors Your Comfort

You do not have to squeeze into something that feels physically or emotionally uncomfortable just to meet a standard.

• Choose a swimsuit that feels good on your body.
  

• Try different cuts, styles, or layers (like a rash guard or swim skirt) if they help you feel more secure.
  

• Give yourself permission to prioritize comfort over "trends" or "rules."

Your swimsuit should be a tool for accessing life, not a test you have to pass.

5. Challenge Perfectionistic Thinking With Self-Compassion

When you hear perfectionistic thoughts like, "I can't be seen like this," practice pausing and asking:

• Is this thought helping me live the life I want?
  

• Would I say this to someone I love?
  

• Can I offer myself a little more kindness in this moment?
  

You are not a “before” picture. You are a living, breathing human who deserves to enjoy her life now — not 10 pounds from now, not when you’re "perfect," not someday. Now.

Every time you challenge a perfectionistic body image thought with compassion, you weaken perfectionism’s grip and strengthen your own inner trust.

Final Thoughts: You Are More Than a Swimsuit

If you take one thing from this, let it be this:
Your worth was never meant to be measured by your reflection.

Perfectionism and anxiety will try to tell you that you are only worthy when you look a certain way.
Healing reminds you that you are worthy because you exist.

You don't need to earn your way into summer.
You don't need to have the "perfect body" to belong at the pool or beach.
You already belong — as you are, today.

If swimsuit anxiety feels overwhelming this season, know that it’s okay to seek help. Therapy, such as eating disorder treatment, can be a powerful place to work through perfectionism, body image challenges, and the deeper fears beneath them. You deserve support that honors your full humanity, not just your surface.

Here’s to making this summer less about self-criticism — and more about living.

If you’re ready for support  reaching out to a specialized therapist can be Give us a call, we are here to help 801-699-6161 or www.insidewellnes.com 

Start Eating Disorder Treatment in Utah

If the thought of swimsuit season brings up anxiety, self-criticism, or shame, you’re not alone. Perfectionism and body image struggles can feel overwhelming—but you are not beyond help. And you are absolutely deserving of care through compassionate, comprehensive eating disorder treatment.

Whether you’ve been silently struggling or just beginning to recognize the signs, you don’t have to face this alone. There’s a team of eating disorder professionals—physicians, therapists, dietitians—ready to support you. Healing isn’t about achieving a “perfect” body. It’s about finding freedom. Here’s how you can get started:

• Book a free consultation or contact us at 801-699-6161

• Meet with a caring and experienced eating disorder therapist

• Start supporting your mental and physical health with Inside Wellness!

Other Services Inside Wellness Offers in Provo and Salt Lake City, UT

Eating disorder treatment is not the only service offered by Inside Wellness. We are happy to provide a variety of other mental health services, including anxiety counseling, body image therapy, and online therapy in Utah. Discover the support and benefits that in-person or online therapy can offer by visiting our blog or FAQ today.

How Eating Disorders Impact the Body—And Why It’s Never Too Late to Heal

As an eating disorder specialist and therapist, I’ve worked with many individuals who believed they “weren’t sick enough” to deserve help. Many of these beliefs come from common cultural misconceptions about what someone with an eating disorder “looks like”.

People often believe that for someone to have an eating disorder, they must have rapid and extreme weight loss resulting in a visibly underweight body type. This is wildly inaccurate. While it can happen this way, the vast majority of people with severe eating disorders are in bodies of all shapes and sizes. Many have not experienced a significant shift in weight because their bodies have adapted to the change in food patterns.

Let’s break down how eating disorders affect different systems in the body, and why it’s never too late to seek eating disorder treatment and start the healing process.

The Heart: A Silent Victim

One of the most concerning impacts of eating disorders is on the cardiovascular system. Malnutrition, whether from restriction, purging, binge eating, or binge-purge cycles, can cause heart irregularities, including atrophy. This means the heart muscle literally shrinks. It becomes weaker and more vulnerable to arrhythmias (irregular heartbeats) and even sudden cardiac arrest.

Bradycardia (a dangerously slow heart rate) is a common finding in those with anorexia nervosa. It’s often seen as a sign of “fitness” by the individual. In reality, it’s a protective mechanism of the body conserving energy in the face of starvation. In Sick Enough, Dr. Gaudiani describes how even mild to moderate restriction can cause heart complications. Even in those who do not appear medically underweight.

But here’s the good news: the heart is remarkably resilient. With nutritional rehabilitation and sustained treatment, heart function can improve dramatically.

The Gastrointestinal System: Slowed and Suffering

Many people with eating disorders experience chronic constipation, bloating, early fullness, and abdominal pain. These symptoms are not “in your head.” They’re the result of slowed gastrointestinal motility due to malnutrition. The stomach empties more slowly, the intestines become sluggish, and digestive enzymes decrease.

Laxative abuse, often present in bulimia nervosa, can cause long-term damage to the colon and electrolyte imbalances. Purging through vomiting not only damages the esophagus but also disrupts the normal acid-base balance in the body. Sometimes dangerously so.

Dr. Gaudiani emphasizes that gastrointestinal distress is often a key driver of continued eating disorder behaviors. Patients restrict or purge to avoid painful bloating or discomfort. Treatment that addresses both refeeding and symptom management is essential for healing the gut and breaking the cycle.

Hormonal Chaos: Disruption Across the Board

One of the body’s first responses to starvation is shutting down non-essential systems to conserve energy. This includes the reproductive system. Many people with eating disorders experience amenorrhea (loss of periods),

The absence of menstruation is not just about fertility. It signals that the body is in survival mode. Low estrogen levels also contribute to early-onset osteoporosis. Dr. Gaudiani’s work underscores that you don’t need to be underweight to experience hormonal dysregulation. Even in larger bodies, chronic restriction can disrupt hormones like cortisol, thyroid hormone, and sex hormones.

With adequate nutrition and consistent treatment, hormonal health can return. However, the longer the restriction continues, the more difficult it becomes to restore. That’s why it’s essential to seek and maintain eating disorder recovery.

Bone Health: Damage That Starts Young

Bone loss is one of the more insidious consequences of eating disorders. It often occurs silently and becomes irreversible if not caught early. Peak bone mass is typically achieved in the late teens to early twenties. This window is often compromised in individuals with eating disorders.

As Dr. Gaudiani outlines, restrictive eating, amenorrhea, and low body weight are a dangerous combination for bone density. Unfortunately, lost bone mass is difficult to regain, even after recovery. This makes early intervention especially critical in young patients.

But even in later years, stopping bone loss and improving stability is possible. Eating disorder recovery includes nutritional rehabilitation, weight restoration, and sometimes medication. It’s not too late to care for your bones.

The Brain: Cognition, Mood, and Identity

Perhaps one of the most misunderstood effects of eating disorders is their impact on the brain. Starvation alters brain function. Individuals often become obsessive, anxious, and depressed. They may experience brain fog, poor concentration, and a distorted sense of self.

Dr. Gaudiani describes the “eating disorder voice” as a neurobiological phenomenon. It gets louder the longer the brain is malnourished. Thoughts become rigid, fear-based, and compulsive. It’s not weakness or vanity—it’s biology.

The beautiful part? The brain, like the heart, is incredibly neuroplastic. With adequate food, compassionate support, and therapy, people can reconnect to their true selves. Their cognitive flexibility returns, emotions stabilize, and joy becomes accessible again.

You Don’t Have to “Hit Rock Bottom” to Deserve Help

A pervasive myth in eating disorder culture is that unless you're severely underweight or hospitalized, you're not "sick enough" to seek treatment. But the reality is: if your relationship with food is interfering with your life, your joy, your health, or your identity, you are sick enough.

Eating disorders are the second-deadliest psychiatric illness after opioid use disorder. They do not discriminate by weight, age, gender, or race. And they are treatable.

Hope for Healing: Thoughts From an Eating Disorder Therapist

Recovery is not easy. It often means confronting fear foods, gaining weight, resting more, and grieving the identity the eating disorder gave you. But it is possible—and it’s absolutely worth it.

Your body is more resilient than you think. Your brain can rewire. Your heart can heal. Your gut can recover. And your life can become joyful, free, and full again.

Start Eating Disorder Treatment in Utah

Whether you’re just beginning to question your relationship with food or you’ve been struggling for years, it’s not too late. You are not beyond help. And you are absolutely deserving of care through comprehensive eating disorder treatment.

If you’re ready to take the first step, know that there is a team of eating disorder professionals—physicians, therapists, dietitians—ready to walk with you. Recovery isn’t just about food. It’s about reclaiming your life. Here’s how you can get started:

• Book a free consultation or contact us at 801-699-6161

• Meet with a caring and experienced eating disorder therapist

• Start supporting your mental and physical health with Inside Wellness!

Other Services Inside Wellness Offers in Provo and Salt Lake City, UT

Eating disorder treatment is not the only service offered by Inside Wellness. We are happy to provide a variety of other mental health services, including anxiety counseling, body image therapy, and online therapy in Utah. Discover the support and benefits that in-person or online therapy can offer by visiting our blog or FAQ today.

Perfectionism in Love: How It Shows Up in Dating & Marriage—and What to Do About It

Perfectionism can be a sneaky saboteur. It often shows up in our careers, creative pursuits, and personal goals—but what many people don’t realize is how perfectionism can quietly weave its way into our relationships too.

If you’re someone who holds yourself to incredibly high standards—or you’re partnered with someone who does—you may already know how this can play out. And while striving for excellence isn't inherently a bad thing, perfectionism takes it to an unhealthy level. It can create emotional distance, chronic dissatisfaction, and ongoing pressure for both people in the relationship.

So let’s unpack what perfectionism is, how it shows up in romantic relationships, and what both partners can do to experience more connection, compassion, and ease.

What is Perfectionism, Really?

Perfectionism is more than just “liking things a certain way.” At its core, it’s a belief that our worth is dependent on being—or appearing—flawless or being “the best”. It is a mix of anxiety meets shame and often involves:

• An intense fear of failure or making mistakes

• Harsh self-criticism

• Unrealistic expectations (of self, others, or both)

• Chronic dissatisfaction—even when things go well

• A need to control outcomes to feel safe

Not only can perfectionism lead to burnout, but it’s also a covert form of shame and anxiety. And shame is the fear of disconnection- an emotion we are hardwired to avoid since it’s a warning signal that we might be doing something that can get us “kicked out of the club” or social group. And from a survival standpoint, staying connected to our families or communities was essential to our well-being or even vital to our physical survival.

During childhood, we receive various data points about our environments, the expectations therein and we receive feedback as well. Oftentimes, those most susceptible to perfectionism may have received praise or positive feedback for acting or excelling in certain ways. This feedback, if deeply internalized or demanded of them, can quickly turn into identity-based patterns where perfectionism can thrive. Over time, we internalize the belief: “If I’m perfect, I’ll be safe and loved.”

But perfectionism is a trap, as perfection is a constantly moving target. And when we bring this mindset into our romantic relationships, things can get complicated.

How Perfectionism Shows Up in Dating

If you're a perfectionist, dating might feel like a minefield. You may:

• Obsess over saying the “right” thing

• Avoid vulnerability for fear of rejection

• Overanalyze texts, dates, and interactions

• Hold potential partners to high or idealized standards

• Feel anxiety when a date doesn't go perfectly

• Struggle to commit because no one ever feels “good enough”

From the outside, you might seem confident and put-together. But inside, there may be a constant hum of anxiety, self-doubt, and pressure to perform as you attempt navigate perfectionism on a daily basis.

If you’re dating a perfectionist, you might feel confused or even intimidated. Maybe you sense they’re holding back, or that you’re being evaluated. You may find it hard to relax, fearing you’ll do something “wrong” and be written off.

How Perfectionism Shows Up in Marriage

Perfectionism doesn’t magically disappear once you’re married—in fact, it can intensify. Here’s how it might show up:

• Emotional Distance: The perfectionist may struggle to be fully vulnerable, fearing judgment or shame.

• Criticism: They may hold their partner to impossible standards, nitpicking or correcting often, not out of malice, but rooted in anxiety (or fears of being judged by others-cue shame).

• Control: A perfectionist might want things done their way—parenting, finances, chores, communication.

• Resentment: Over time, the perfectionist may feel frustrated their partner doesn’t meet their expectations. The partner may feel like they can never measure up.

For the partner who’s not a perfectionist, this can feel like walking on eggshells. You may feel unappreciated, not good enough, or constantly corrected. It can wear on your confidence and the emotional safety of the relationship.

To the Perfectionist

No one is asking you to stop caring or striving to do your best. Your truest self and those who love you are hoping that you can identify what is happening inside of this pursuit. Oftentimes, people who are stuck in a perfectionist pattern often feel certain ways in their relationships. You may:

• Feel chronically anxious or dissatisfied in the relationship.

• Struggle to enjoy the moment because you're always scanning for what's wrong.

• Beat yourself up over small mistakes or conflicts.

• Crave closeness but fear being truly seen, flaws and all.

• Secretly feel like a failure, even when you’re trying your best.

So, how can you unhook yourself from these patterns?

1. Name the pattern: Awareness is the first step. Notice when your inner critic shows up—are you setting impossible standards? Are you withholding love (from yourself or your partner) unless things feel “just right”?

2. Practice self-compassion: Perfectionism often masks deep shame or fear. Learn to speak to yourself kindly, especially when you feel you’ve messed up.

3. Challenge unrealistic expectations: Ask yourself, “Is this standard truly necessary? Is it helping or hurting my relationship?”

4. Let your partner in: Vulnerability builds intimacy. Share your fears, struggles, and insecurities instead of trying to hide them.

5. Celebrate progress, not perfection: Relationships are messy, imperfect, and full of learning. And that’s okay.

Tips for the Partner of a Perfectionist

1. Don’t take it personally: Their criticism or control is likely more about their own anxiety than your shortcomings.

2. Speak up with kindness: Let them know how their perfectionism impacts you, using “I” statements (e.g., “I feel discouraged when my efforts aren’t acknowledged”).

3. Encourage vulnerability: Create a safe space for your partner to share without fixing or judging.

4. Set boundaries: If their expectations are unrealistic or hurtful, it’s okay to lovingly say, “I can’t meet that standard, and I won’t compromise my well-being trying to.”

5. Affirm the good: Many perfectionists rarely hear they’re enough. Gentle reminders can go a long way.

The Truth: You Don’t Need to Be Perfect to Be Loved

Perfectionism tells us love must be earned through achievement, control, or flawlessness. But real intimacy is built on authenticity, acceptance, and grace. The irony? The more we try to be perfect, the more we block the very connection we crave.

If you're struggling with perfectionism in your dating life or marriage, you’re not alone—and you don’t have to stay stuck in this cycle.

A qualified anxiety therapist can help you unravel the roots of anxiety and perfectionism, challenge harmful patterns, and learn to build healthier, more fulfilling relationships. Whether you're the perfectionist or the partner, healing is possible.

Start Perfectionism Treatment in Utah

If you’re ready to stop letting perfectionism and anxiety steal the joy from your relationships, reach out to a licensed perfectionism therapist in Provo, UT. You deserve a love that makes space for the whole, imperfect you. You can seek support with Inside Wellness by following these simple steps:

• Book a free consultation or give us a call at 801-699-6161

• Meet with a caring and experienced perfectionism therapist

• Start supporting your mental wellness today!

Other Services Inside Wellness Offers in Provo and Salt Lake City, UT

Perfectionism and anxiety treatment are not the only services offered by Inside Wellness. We gladly provide other forms of mental health support, including eating disorder treatment, body image therapy, and online therapy in Utah. Learn more about the encouragement and benefits in-person or online therapy can offer by visiting our blog or FAQ today.

How Your Brain Functions During an Eating Disorder

Eating disorders are often viewed through a physical lens—weight changes, nutritional deficiencies, and physical impact on bone or organ health. 

The brain, an organ that requires a steady supply of nutrients to function optimally, is profoundly impacted by disordered eating patterns & inadequate caloric intake. Understanding these effects can help individuals with eating disorders, as well as their loved ones, recognize the importance of seeking proper treatment.

Dr. Jennifer Gaudiani, a leading expert in eating disorder medicine and author of Sick Enough, describes in detail how malnutrition and disordered eating can alter brain function, cognition, and emotional regulation. While this topic can be overwhelming, learning about it with compassion rather than fear can help individuals better understand their experiences and work toward recovery.

1. The Brain on Starvation: What Happens When the Body Lacks Nutrition?

The human brain makes up about 2% of total body weight but consumes approximately 20% of daily energy intake. When someone is restricting food, whether through intentional dieting, anorexia nervosa, or another disordered eating pattern, the brain doesn’t get the fuel it needs. Over time, this lack of nutrients has significant consequences.

• Cognitive Fog and Difficulty Concentrating: Without enough energy, brain function slows down. This can make tasks that once felt easy—reading, problem-solving, or even holding a conversation—seem exhausting or frustrating.

• Obsessive Thoughts About Food: Interestingly, the brain’s survival instinct kicks in when it isn’t receiving enough nutrients. Research has shown that individuals who are deprived of food often become preoccupied with thoughts of eating, meal planning, or food-related rituals. 

• Memory and Learning Impairments: Studies have found that malnutrition can shrink certain areas of the brain, including the hippocampus, which is responsible for memory and learning. This can make it difficult to retain new information, a challenge for students trying to keep up academically.

2. The Emotional Toll: Anxiety, Depression, and Irritability

The effects of eating disorders aren’t just cognitive; they deeply affect emotional regulation as well.

• Increased Anxiety and Depression: Malnutrition disrupts neurotransmitter balance, leading to increased anxiety and depressive symptoms. Many individuals with eating disorders experience heightened fear, guilt, or sadness, often feeling stuck in a cycle they can’t break.

• Irritability and Mood Swings: The brain relies on stable blood sugar levels to regulate mood. When food intake is inconsistent, blood sugar levels fluctuate, leading to increased irritability, anger, or emotional outbursts.

• Loss of Interest in Socialization: Many people with eating disorders withdraw from social activities, not only due to anxiety around food but also because of reduced energy and interest in activities that once brought joy. This isolation can further exacerbate feelings of loneliness and depression.

3. The Gut-Brain Connection: Why Digestion and Mental Health Go Hand in Hand

A growing body of research highlights the deep connection between gut health and brain function. The gut contains millions of neurons and communicates directly with the brain via the vagus nerve. When someone is engaging in disordered eating behaviors, this gut-brain connection is disrupted.

• Slowed Digestion and Gastrointestinal Distress: When the body is in a malnourished state, it prioritizes essential functions like keeping the heart beating, often slowing down digestion in the process. This can lead to bloating, constipation, and nausea, which can further reinforce disordered eating behaviors.

• Disrupted Hunger and Fullness Cues: The brain and gut communicate to regulate hunger and satiety. When someone restricts food for an extended period, their body may stop sending proper hunger signals, making it difficult to recognize when they need nourishment. Conversely, binge-like eating episodes may occur as the body tries to compensate for prolonged restriction.

• Impact on Serotonin Levels: Around 90% of serotonin, a neurotransmitter responsible for mood regulation, is produced in the gut. Disruptions in eating patterns can negatively impact serotonin production, contributing to increased feelings of depression and anxiety.

4. Long-Term Neurological Effects: Are They Reversible?

Many individuals worry about whether the brain damage caused by an eating disorder is permanent. While prolonged malnutrition can lead to changes in brain structure, research shows that with proper refeeding and treatment, the brain has an incredible ability to heal.

• Gray Matter Loss and Recovery: MRI studies on individuals with anorexia nervosa have shown a reduction in gray matter volume, which can affect cognition and emotional regulation. However, with weight restoration and proper nutrition, these changes are typically reversible.

• Rebuilding Neural Pathways: Just as the brain adapts to malnutrition, it can also adapt to recovery. Engaging in consistent, adequate nutrition allows the brain to rebuild and restore normal functioning over time.

• The Role of Therapy and Support: In addition to physical healing, therapy (such as cognitive-behavioral therapy and nutrition counseling from an eating disorder expert) can help individuals retrain their thought patterns and develop a healthier relationship with food.

5. Moving Toward Healing: Steps to Support Brain Health in Recovery

If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, it’s important to know that recovery is possible. Supporting brain health through proper nourishment and self-care can play a key role in healing.

• Consult with Eating Disorder Specialists or Facility:  Call any reputable eating disorder program of provider & ask for an assessment. They will give a recommendation for the level of care needed to safely help you do nutritional restoration & treatment. You are not obligated to use them as your provider but they can give you resources & recommendations to consider.

• Prioritize Regular, Balanced Meals: Eating consistently throughout the day ensures that the brain receives a steady supply of energy. This can improve cognitive function, mood stability, and emotional resilience. This should be done in tandem with a eating disorder dietician because there are many associated and even fatal risks of this being done too slowly, too quickly, or in certain ways.  

• Seek Professional Support: Working with a registered dietitian, therapist, or medical professional specializing in eating disorders can provide individualized guidance for recovery.

• Practice Self-Compassion: Recovery is not linear, and setbacks are part of the process. Being kind to yourself and recognizing progress, no matter how small, is essential.

Final Thoughts: A Compassionate Perspective on Brain Health and Eating Disorders

Understanding how eating disorders impact the brain is not meant to create fear or shame but rather to empower individuals with knowledge. The brain is incredibly resilient, and with the right support, healing is entirely possible. If you or someone you love is struggling, reaching out for help is a powerful step toward reclaiming not just physical health, but mental and emotional well-being as well.

Start Eating Disorder Treatment in Provo, UT

You are not alone in this journey, and your brain—and your body—deserve the nourishment and care they need to thrive. You can seek support with Inside Wellness by following these simple steps:

1. Contact us or give us a call at 801-699-6161

2. Meet with a caring therapist

3. Start supporting your brain health today!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Eating disorder treatment is not the only service offered by Inside Wellness. We are happy to offer support with other forms of mental health support including anxiety treatment and body image therapy. Learn more about the support in person or online therapy can offer today by visiting our blog or FAQ today.

Perfectionism & Burnout: How to Stop Running on Empty

If you’re a high-achieving college student, you probably know the feeling: pushing yourself to excel in every class, saying yes to every opportunity, and constantly striving to be the best version of yourself. You work hard because you want to succeed—but at what cost?

Perfectionism often masquerades as ambition, making it seem like a strength. And in some ways, it is. Your high standards push you to achieve incredible things. But when those standards become impossible to meet, perfectionism can turn into a relentless, exhausting cycle that leads straight to burnout. If you’ve ever felt drained, overwhelmed, or like you’re running on empty despite giving your all, perfectionism might be the culprit.

The Link Between Perfectionism and Burnout

Burnout isn’t just about feeling tired—it’s deep exhaustion, both mental and physical, caused by prolonged stress. Perfectionists are especially prone to burnout because they often set unrealistic expectations, fear failure, and struggle to rest. If you find yourself constantly:

• Rewriting essays multiple times even though the first draft was already great

• Saying yes to every club, internship, or leadership role because you feel like you should

• Feeling guilty when you take breaks or don’t check everything off your to-do list

• Beating yourself up over a 90% because it wasn’t a 100%

• Struggling to relax because you feel like you’re falling behind

…then you might be experiencing perfectionism-driven burnout.

The problem is that perfectionism convinces you that you’re never doing enough. And when your self-worth is tied to achievement, even your successes don’t feel satisfying—they just raise the bar higher. This constant pressure can leave you feeling exhausted, anxious, and unmotivated.

The good news? You don’t have to live like this.

Here are some practical ways to break the cycle and protect yourself from burnout while still striving for excellence.

1. Redefine Success (Hint: It’s Not Just About Being Perfect)

Perfectionists tend to have an all-or-nothing mindset. You might think, If I’m not the best, then I’ve failed. But real success isn’t about being flawless—it’s about learning, growing, and making progress.

Try shifting your focus from perfect to excellent. Excellence allows for mistakes, learning curves, and flexibility. Instead of aiming for perfection on every assignment, ask yourself: Did I learn something? Did I do my best within reason? If the answer is yes, that’s a win.

2. Set Boundaries with Your Inner Critic

Your inner critic is that voice in your head that says, You’re not working hard enough. You could’ve done better. You should be doing more.

Instead of letting it run the show, practice talking back to it. When that critical voice pops up, challenge it:

• Would I say this to a friend?

• Is this actually true, or just fear talking?

• Is this thought helping me or hurting me?

By recognizing that your inner critic isn’t always right, you can start to create mental space for self-compassion and realistic expectations.

3. Learn to Rest Without Guilt

Perfectionists often feel like they have to earn rest. But the truth is, rest isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. Just like you wouldn’t expect your phone to work on 1% battery, you can’t expect your brain to function at full capacity without recharging.

Start incorporating intentional breaks into your schedule:

• Take 10-minute breaks between study sessions.

• Schedule non-negotiable downtime, like a movie night or coffee with friends.

• Prioritize sleep—pulling all-nighters isn’t a badge of honor, it’s a fast track to burnout.

You are allowed to rest. In fact, you need to rest in order to do your best work.

4. Embrace “Good Enough” Work

Perfectionists often spend twice as long on assignments, reworking things that were already great. But not everything needs to be perfect—sometimes good enough really is enough.

Give yourself permission to:

• Stop editing that paper after two rounds of revisions instead of five.

• Submit a project that meets the requirements without obsessing over every detail.

• Accept that sometimes, doing well is better than trying (and failing) to be flawless.

Your time and energy are valuable—use them wisely.

5. Ask for Help When You Need It

Perfectionists often feel like they have to handle everything alone. But burnout thrives in isolation. If you’re struggling, reach out for support:

• Talk to a trusted friend or mentor.

• Visit your college’s counseling center.

• Let a professor know if you’re overwhelmed.

Asking for help doesn’t mean you’re weak—it means you’re human. And the strongest, most successful people know when to lean on others. Perfectionism can affect your relationships and your own well-being, so remind yourself that it’s okay to ask for help when you need it.

Final Thoughts: You Are More Than Your Achievements

At the end of the day, you are so much more than your GPA, resume, or accomplishments. Your worth isn’t defined by how many leadership roles you hold or how perfect your work is. It’s defined by who you are as a person—your kindness, your resilience, your passion.

Burnout isn’t a badge of honor. And perfectionism, while tempting, isn’t a sustainable way to live. You can be successful without running yourself into the ground. By setting healthier expectations, learning to rest, and embracing imperfection, you’ll not only protect your well-being—you’ll actually set yourself up for a more fulfilling, balanced life.

So take a deep breath, let go of that impossible standard, and remind yourself: you are already enough.

Start Addressing Burnout, Perfectionism and Anxiety in Provo, UT

If perfectionism and burnout are leaving you exhausted, it's time to break the cycle. You don’t have to do it alone. Whether you're struggling with burnout, setting healthier boundaries, or learning to embrace rest, Inside Wellness can help you find balance and reclaim your well-being. Reach out today by following these simple steps:

1. Contact us or give us a call 801-699-6161

2. Meet with a caring anxiety therapist

3. Start changing your story!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Anxiety treatment isn’t the only service that Inside Wellness offers. Other mental health services include eating disorder treatment and body image therapy. Learn more about the support in person or online therapy can offer. Visit our blog or FAQ today.

The Perfectionism Trap: Understanding It and Learning to Let Go

Have you ever felt like nothing you do is quite good enough? Maybe you spend hours rewriting an email at work, feeling like it still doesn’t sound “right.” Or maybe you avoid starting a big project because you’re afraid it won’t turn out exactly as you imagined.

That, my friend, is perfectionism at work.

Perfectionism isn’t just about “trying to do your best.” It’s about tying your self-worth to flawless performance and feeling like anything less than perfect is unacceptable. It’s exhausting, anxiety-inducing, and—ironically—often leads to procrastination, burnout, and self-doubt.

Let’s take a deep dive into the core of perfectionism, how it shows up in different areas of life, and, most importantly, how you can start breaking free through self-compassion.

The Core Tenets of Perfectionism

At its core, perfectionism is driven by the belief that:

Mistakes = Failure: There’s no room for getting things wrong or learning through trial and error. If it’s not perfect, it’s not worth doing.

Your Worth Is Tied to Your Achievements: You feel like you’re “only as good” as your latest success. If you don’t excel, you fear others will think less of you—or worse, you’ll think less of yourself.

Control is Everything: Perfectionists often try to control outcomes, whether that’s by obsessively checking work, avoiding risks, or delaying decisions until they feel completely “ready” (which never really happens).

There’s a Constant Fear of Judgment: You don’t just want to succeed—you want to be seen as successful, competent, and put-together at all times. The idea of others seeing your flaws or struggles feels unbearable.

Rest Feels Undeserved: Relaxing feels like slacking off. You think, “I’ll rest when I’ve accomplished everything on my list.” But that list is never-ending.

While these beliefs might seem like they push you toward success, they often backfire, leading to:

• Procrastination (because if it can’t be perfect, why start?)

• Burnout (because perfectionism is a full-time job)

• Low self-worth (because you never feel “good enough”)

• Anxiety and avoidance (because failure feels catastrophic)

Now let’s see what perfectionism actually looks like in everyday life.

How Perfectionism Shows Up in Different Life Stages

The College Student: The Fear of Getting it Wrong

Meet Sarah. She’s a college sophomore who spends hours perfecting her essays before turning them in. If she gets an A-, she spirals into self-doubt, convinced she’s not as smart as she thought.

When studying for exams, she spends so much time re-reading every chapter that she never finishes her study plan. Her anxiety keeps her up late, and even when she does get good grades, she feels like she should have done more.

How Perfectionism Holds Her Back:

• She struggles with procrastination because she doesn’t want to start assignments unless she’s sure they’ll be great.

• She overworks herself, but no matter how much she does, she never feels truly satisfied.

The Young Professional: Hustling for Approval

Now meet Jake. He’s a young marketing professional in his first full-time job. Every email he writes goes through multiple drafts because he’s terrified of sounding unprofessional. He volunteers for every project—even when he’s overwhelmed—because he wants to prove himself.

At meetings, he hesitates to share ideas in case they’re not “perfect.” He replays conversations in his head, wondering if he said anything that made him look incompetent.

How Perfectionism Holds Him Back:

• He’s constantly second-guessing himself, which slows down his work.

• He takes on too much, fearing that saying “no” will make him look bad.

• He’s afraid to take risks or speak up, even when he has great ideas.

The Parent: The Pressure to Be Everything

Finally, meet Lisa. She’s a mother of two who feels like she’s failing if she’s not doing everything “right.” She reads parenting blogs obsessively, trying to make sure her kids eat the healthiest meals, get the best education, and never experience any struggle.

She compares herself to other moms on social media, feeling guilty if she loses her patience or doesn’t plan picture-perfect family outings. If her child struggles in school or has a meltdown, she blames herself, wondering if she should have done more.

How Perfectionism Holds Her Back:

• She struggles to relax and feels like she’s “doing enough.”

• She’s hard on herself for things that are outside of her control.

• She puts everyone else first but never gives herself grace.

How to Challenge Perfectionism Through Self-Compassion

Perfectionism can feel like a heavy burden, but the good news is you don’t have to stay stuck in it. The antidote? Self-compassion.

Self-compassion means treating yourself with the same kindness, patience, and understanding that you would offer a friend. It’s about embracing imperfection and realizing that your worth isn’t tied to how “perfect” you are.

Here are a few practical ways to start challenging perfectionism with self-compassion:

1. Talk to Yourself Like You Would a Friend

Would you tell your best friend, “You’re such a failure because you made a small mistake”? No? Then why say it to yourself?

When you catch yourself in self-criticism mode, ask:
“What would I say to a friend in this situation?”
Then say that to yourself.

2. Embrace “Good Enough”

Instead of striving for 100% perfection, aim for 80% progress. Done is better than perfect. Improvement matters more than flawlessness.

Ask yourself:

• Is this actually not good enough, or am I holding myself to an impossible standard?

• What would happen if I let this be “good enough” and moved on?

3. Accept Mistakes as Growth Opportunities

Perfectionists fear failure, but mistakes are a normal part of learning.

Instead of saying “I failed”, try:
“I’m learning.”
“This didn’t go as planned, but what can I take from it?”

Mistakes don’t define you. They help you grow.

4. Challenge the “All-or-Nothing” Thinking

Perfectionists tend to see things in black and white—it’s either perfect or a failure. Challenge that by asking:

“Did I really fail, or did I just not meet my impossible standard?”
“Is this really a disaster, or is it just uncomfortable?”

There’s a whole gray area between perfect and failure—and that’s where real life happens.

5. Give Yourself Permission to Rest

You don’t need to earn rest by “doing enough.” You are worthy of rest and joy simply because you exist.

Ask yourself:

• Would I tell someone else they don’t deserve to take a break?

• How can I allow myself to rest without guilt?

Final Thoughts: Progress Over Perfection

Perfectionism might feel like a badge of honor, but in reality, it’s a heavy chain that keeps you stuck. Real success comes from embracing imperfection, taking risks, and giving yourself grace.

So today, take a deep breath and remind yourself:
You are already enough.
You are allowed to be a work in progress.
You don’t have to be perfect to be worthy, loved, and successful.

Because you are.

Start Overcoming Perfectionism and Anxiety With Therapy for Anxiety in Utah

If you struggle with perfectionism, anxiety, or just feel like you’d like some help learning how to put self-compassion into action, reach out and give us a call at 801-699-6161. Our team is ready to provide support in overcoming perfectionism, you don’t have to navigate it alone. You can start your therapy journey with Inside Wellness by following these steps:

1. Contact us or give us a call at 801-699-6161

2. Meet with a caring therapist

3. Start coping with your anxiety in more healthy ways!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Anxiety treatment isn’t the only service that is offered by Inside Wellness. Our team is happy to offer support with other forms of mental health support including eating disorder treatment and body image therapy. Learn more about the support in person or online therapy can offer today by visiting our blog or FAQ today.

Overcoming A Specific Anxiety Trigger: How Different Therapy Approaches Can Help

In this blog, we will be choosing one example of a common anxiety trigger to show how the varying therapy modalities would approach the treatment of this type of anxiety. 

There are many ways in which we can all have specific things in our lives that can bring in mild, moderate, severe, or even debilitating levels of anxiety.  Learning ways to help your fears & negative experiences fade into the background is always worth pursuing.  Most of the time, people want to understand what type of therapist to see & what approach they think may work best for them with anxiety.  

Different approaches may be better for some situations than others.  Some anxiety is more general, and some is more specific.  We will be outlining the different modalities specific to a singular trigger, the fear of dogs. If just reading that evokes high emotion, give yourself permission to stop reading, seek support, and reach out for help.  Therapy can make things easier; you do not have to suffer in fear & avoidance.

If you've ever found yourself crossing the street to avoid a dog or feeling your heart race at the sound of barking, you're not alone.

Anxiety around dogs—whether from a past negative experience or an unexplained fear—can be overwhelming and limiting. The good news? There are several effective therapy approaches that can help you regain control and feel more at ease.

Let’s break down some of the most effective therapeutic methods for anxiety and how they might be used to help someone overcome their fear of dogs.

Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Changing Fear-Based Thoughts

CBT is one of the most well-researched and effective treatments for anxiety. It works by identifying and challenging unhelpful thought patterns that fuel fear.

Example: Imagine someone has an ingrained belief that “All dogs are dangerous and will bite me.” A CBT therapist would help the person recognize that while some dogs can bite, the majority are friendly. The therapist might introduce evidence to counter this fear, such as statistics on how rare dog attacks are or stories of positive dog encounters. Over time, the person learns to replace fearful thoughts with more balanced ones, such as, “Most dogs are friendly, and I can learn how to read their body language to feel safer.”

Exposure Therapy: Facing the Fear Gradually

This therapy is all about slowly and systematically exposing a person to their fear in a controlled way so their brain stops perceiving it as a threat.

Example: A therapist might first ask the person to look at pictures of dogs, then watch videos of calm dogs, and then observe a real dog from a distance. Step by step, the exposure increases—maybe walking near a leashed dog in a park or eventually petting a small, well-trained dog. The goal? To retrain the nervous system to stop reacting as if every dog encounter is life-threatening.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): Making Peace with Fear

ACT takes a different approach—it doesn’t try to get rid of anxious thoughts but instead teaches people how to make peace with them. The focus is on values-based action: living life fully despite fear.

Example: Someone who loves hiking may have avoided trails because they fear running into dogs. In ACT, the therapist would help them recognize, “I don’t want my fear to control my life—I value adventure and spending time outdoors.” Instead of battling anxiety, the person learns to acknowledge their fear (“I notice that I feel anxious about dogs”) while still choosing to go on the hike. With mindfulness techniques, they practice allowing the anxiety to be there without letting it dictate their actions.

Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): Regulating the Fear Response

DBT is particularly helpful for people who experience strong emotional reactions to their fears—like full-blown panic when a dog walks by. It teaches emotional regulation skills to calm the nervous system.

Example: If someone’s anxiety spikes from zero to ten at the mere sight of a dog, a DBT therapist might teach distress tolerance techniques like paced breathing (inhaling for four counts, exhaling for six) or grounding exercises (naming five things they see, four things they hear, etc.). Over time, these skills help the person regain a sense of control instead of being overwhelmed by fear.

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): Healing Past Trauma

For those whose dog anxiety stems from a traumatic experience—like a childhood dog bite—EMDR can be incredibly effective. This therapy uses guided eye movements (or other forms of bilateral stimulation) to help the brain reprocess distressing memories.

Example: Someone bitten by a dog as a child might still have a visceral fear response whenever they see a dog, even if it happened years ago. In EMDR, the therapist helps the person revisit the memory in a safe way, allowing the brain to process it so it no longer triggers an intense fight-or-flight response. This can significantly reduce fear over time.

Brainspotting (BSP): Accessing the Subconscious Fear Response

Brainspotting is a relatively new but powerful therapy that helps process deep emotional and traumatic memories by using eye positioning to access where fear is “stored” in the brain.

Example: A therapist might guide a client to focus on a specific eye position while thinking about their fear of dogs. This helps pinpoint where the fear is held in the brain and allows deeper emotional processing to occur. Over time, this can help the person move past their anxiety in a way that feels natural rather than forced. Many people report that after Brainspotting, their fear feels less intense or even completely neutralized.

Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART): Rewriting the Fear Memory

ART combines elements of EMDR, guided imagery, and memory reconsolidation to rapidly process and “rewrite” distressing memories. It helps the brain detach the intense emotional charge from past experiences so that they no longer feel overwhelmed.

Example: If someone’s fear of dogs stems from a past bite, an ART therapist might guide them through visualizing the memory while using rapid eye movements to process and neutralize the fear. The unique part? The person can “rewrite” the memory, replacing the scary parts with a new, peaceful image. For example, instead of replaying a traumatic dog bite, they might visualize safely petting a calm dog. The brain accepts this new image, helping to reduce fear at the subconscious level.

Final Thoughts: There's No One-Size-Fits-All Approach

Anxiety—whether about dogs or anything else—doesn’t have to control your life. Therapy offers multiple paths to healing, and the best approach depends on your unique experience. Whether you prefer changing your thought patterns (CBT), gradually facing your fear (Exposure Therapy), or processing trauma at a subconscious level (Brainspotting, ART, or EMDR), there’s a way forward.

Start Therapy for Anxiety in Salt Lake City, UT

If anxiety is holding you back, reaching out to a therapist could be the first step toward feeling more empowered. You deserve to live a life that isn’t dictated by fear! Reach out & give us a call, we can help. Start your therapy journey with Inside Wellness by following these simple steps:

1. Contact us or give us a call 801-699-6161

2. Meet with a caring anxiety therapist

3. Start changing your story!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Anxiety treatment isn’t the only service that Inside Wellness offers. We are happy to offer support with other mental health services, including eating disorder treatment and body image therapy. Learn more about the support in person or online therapy can offer today by visiting our blog or FAQ today.