Navigating Perfectionism During College Finals

Tools for Success and Self-Compassion

As college students, we all know the feeling: that tightness in our chest, the racing thoughts, the relentless pressure to excel. Yes, finals season is upon us once again, and for many of us, it brings not only the stress of exams but also the suffocating grip of perfectionism. You might find yourself striving for flawlessness in every assignment, every test, every paper. But what if I told you that perfectionism doesn't have to be your constant companion during finals? What if there were tools and strategies to help you navigate this stressful time with a little more ease and a lot more self-compassion?

5 Ways Perfectionism Can Present During Finals:

Fear of Failure:

Perfectionists often equate failure with personal worth, leading to intense anxiety about performing poorly on exams or assignments.

Procrastination:

The pressure to achieve perfection can sometimes lead to avoidance and procrastination, as the fear of not meeting impossibly high standards becomes overwhelming.

Self-Criticism:

Perfectionists are their own harshest critics, constantly berating themselves for any perceived mistakes or shortcomings.

Burnout:

The relentless pursuit of perfection can result in burnout, leaving perfectionistic students feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, and emotionally drained.

Imposter Syndrome:

Perfectionists may struggle with feeling like frauds, doubting their abilities, and fearing that they will be exposed as inadequate.

Tools to Combat Perfectionism During Finals:

Set Realistic Goals:

Instead of aiming for perfection, set realistic and achievable goals for yourself during finals. Break down tasks into smaller, more manageable steps, and remember to take it one day (or one hour) at a time.

Practice Self-Compassion:

Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. This is always harder than it seems but if you wouldn’t say it to your bestie, then maybe it’s not kind or fair to say to yourself.

Challenge All-or-Nothing Thinking:

Perfectionism happens when we fall into the trap of all-or-nothing thinking, believing that anything less than perfect is a failure. Challenge these black-and-white thoughts by acknowledging the gray areas and embracing the concept of progress over perfection. I always remind students that B stands for balance and that C’s get degrees. I know reading that may spark more anxiety but the goal here is to remind yourself that it can be okay if you don’t get the grade you’re hoping for every time.

Focus on Effort, Not Outcome:

Shift your focus away from the end result and toward the effort you put into your work. Value the process of learning and growth rather than fixating solely on the outcome.

Practice Mindfulness:

Incorporate mindfulness practices into your daily routine to help reduce stress and anxiety during finals. Take breaks to practice deep breathing, take a break, and sing a song to help you anchor back into the moment. Perfectionism or anxiety puts us ahead or behind the data, and both lead us to feel much more stressed and to have more extreme thinking.

Seek Support:

Reach out to friends, family members, or a trusted mentor for support during finals. Share your struggles with perfectionism and ask for encouragement and reassurance when you need it most. College is a very different animal than high school or the workforce, so it’s okay if you feel lost & need a reminder that it will all be okay.

Set Boundaries:

Prioritize self-care during finals by setting boundaries around your time and energy. Know when to say no to additional commitments and give yourself permission to take breaks and rest when needed.

Let Go of Comparison:

Avoid comparing yourself to others during finals, perhaps the hardest of them all. The funny thing with college is that it is geared towards a specific type of learning and testing style. So if it’s your jam, that’s awesome, and if it’s not, then that’s okay too. In college finals & grades seem like the measure of success in the real world. And yet, if you surveyed most people in the workforce, it really becomes irrelevant outside of getting into graduate school, etc. What matters is effort, teamwork, and a host of knowledge & skills relevant to your career path.

Perfectionism does not allow for a degree of difficulty to exist, but if you can acknowledge this reality, finals will go smoother for you. The truth is that some finals are better than others, some semesters are easier while others are harder. And as humans sometimes we can do more or less than the finals before this one. Be kind to yourself, study hard, take lots of breaks, eat regularly, and get plenty of sleep…….and then let the chips fall as they may.

Start Working With an Anxiety Therapist in Salt Lake City, UT

If perfectionism and anxiety take over your life and you want to loosen your grip while still doing well, reach out. Inside Wellness can help. Take it from a recovered perfectionist, change is possible, and life can have more ease in it while still striving for excellence. You can start working with a caring therapist by following these simple steps:

1. Call or message us today at 801-699-6161.

2. Learn more about our services and our team.

3. Start finding the right therapeutic fit for you!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Anxiety treatment isn’t the only service Inside Wellness offers support with addressing. Our team is happy to offer support with other forms of mental health support including eating disorder treatment and body image therapy. Learn more about the support in person or online therapy can offer today by visiting our blog or FAQ today.

When to Turn to Online Resources and When to Seek Therapy for Your Anxiety

Lately, you’ve noticed that your anxiety is kicking up again, and you realize that if you don’t do something, it will start to take over your life. You find yourself thinking about how to get things into a better spot. Do you tell your parents or roommates you are struggling, or simply suffer in silence? Do you google resources and go at this through social media tips or do you find a therapist to help you deal with the many thoughts racing in your head? There are many ways that people can cope with anxiety, so let’s explore the options in front of you.

Online tools may help when you are experiencing the following things:

Feeling Overwhelmed:

It's normal to feel overwhelmed during stressful times in life. Most people feel anxiety when starting a new job, preparing for finals, or making a significant decision in your life. This type of anxiety is short-term and subsides when the circumstances shift. While your stress & worry levels have increased, they feel manageable. You can still fall asleep even if it takes just a little bit longer than normal. You can prepare in a time frame that is normal for the circumstances & focus on that process. You’re appetite and normal routines are still intact. But you still feel a bit thrown off, but you feel like if you had a few tools you’d be able to get by just fine.

Seeking Information to Understand Your Experiences:

If you feel you don’t really understand what anxiety is and or how it is managed, then googling some basics may be of help. Online can be a great way to learn the basics of something so long as you search reputable sources and don’t go down the “rabbit hole” and saturate yourself with information.

Exploring Self-Help Tools:

Online mental health apps, such as Calm or Headspace, meditation-videos, relaxation exercises, and self-help books can be effective tools for managing mild to moderate anxiety symptoms. These resources are easily accessible and can be incorporated into your daily practices.

Seeking Peer Support:

Connecting with other college students who may be experiencing similar challenges can be reassuring and validating. TikTok, IG, and other online platforms may offer some insights into yourself and help you feel understood. They often provide a space for people to feel less alone or understand the different ways anxiety can present. Online can also lead you to resources in your area. Most clients I see are often unaware of the options open to them as college students or therapy benefits through a full-time employer. As per usual, don’t believe everything you see on social media or the internet, many things are accurate and many things are not.

When to Seek Mental Health Therapy for Anxiety:

You should always seek mental health therapy at any point in your journey. The goal of therapy is to help give you support & tools to improve the quality of your life. So if your anxiety is mild, it’s likely that you will only need a short-term therapy approach. If your anxiety is worse than you thought, then therapy time frames will be adjusted accordingly.

Persistent Anxiety Symptoms:

If you're experiencing persistent anxiety symptoms that interfere with your daily functioning, such as difficulty concentrating, disrupted sleep, or avoiding social situations.

Impact on Relationships:

You feel like you are showing up differently in your relationships than in the past. You may find yourself being more agitated than normal or you are not able to be with others and be relaxed and or focused on what’s happening in the moment. It may be that you feel like everything is going okay and you’ll feel better soon, but others are telling you that you are overly worried or stressed.

Changes in Behavior:

You’ve noticed that your daily patterns have changed. You may be experiencing a shift in your appetite or have a constant state of muscle tension or that butterflies-in-your-stomach kind of feeling. You may find yourself feeling more rigid or over-controlling than normal or that the only way you can cope is to not care at all about it.

Decline in Academic Performance:

If your anxiety is significantly impacting your academic performance, such as missing classes, falling behind on assignments, or experiencing difficulty concentrating, seeking therapy can help you address underlying issues and improve your academic success.

What is different with individual therapy vs an online resources approach?

Personalized Treatment:

Mental health therapy offers personalized treatment tailored to your specific needs and challenges. A licensed therapist can help you explore the root causes of your anxiety and develop effective strategies for managing symptoms. They can also help you look at the tools you have already learned to better capture when, how, and why certain tools work in some situations and not in others. They can teach you coping skills, relaxation techniques, and cognitive-behavioral strategies to address anxious thoughts and behaviors.

Safe and Confidential Space:

Therapy provides a safe and confidential space to express your feelings, fears, and concerns without judgment. It's an opportunity to explore your emotions openly and work through difficult experiences with the support of a compassionate professional. Many people find they like this aspect more than they anticipated. They can share the full impact of their anxiety and feel supported without having to talk about it on a daily basis.

Building Resilience:

Through therapy, you can build resilience and develop skills to cope with your current challenges more effectively. Therapy equips you with the tools and resources you need to navigate anxiety and cultivate greater emotional well-being.

Long-Term Benefits:

Investing in therapy for anxiety can yield long-term benefits beyond college or your current job. By addressing anxiety early and developing coping mechanisms that work for you, your overall mental health can be the best it’s ever been. This will set you up for more success when you come up against similar challenges later in your life.

Begin Therapy for Anxiety in Salt Lake City, UT

While online resources can be valuable for coping with mild anxiety symptoms and providing support during times of transition, seeking mental health therapy is essential for addressing persistent anxiety that significantly impacts your life. Life will always have ups & downs in terms of stress levels. You should be able to decide how to weather those challenges. If you are unsure what would best help you at this time, give us a call. We are here to help you see what level of care you may need and we want to help you get relief & resiliency. You can start your therapy journey with Inside Wellness by following these steps:

1. Reach out and give us a call at 801-699-6161.

2. Learn more about our team.

3. Start getting support for your anxiety!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Anxiety treatment isn’t the only mental health service we offer. We understand that you may experience other issues that you need support with. This is why Inside Wellness offers support with a variety of mental health services. Other services offered include body image counseling, eating disorder treatment, and online Therapy in Utah. Feel free to visit our blog for more helpful information today!

Why You Should Befriend Your Anxiety

Anxiety has become your Achilles heel and the last thing you want to do is do anything that seems like any form of embracing or accepting it. 

I hear you, anxiety can be so overpowering in our bodies and in our heads that we want to do almost anything to get out of it, and fast.  

You’ve tried to stuff it into the depths of your mind and pretend that you are cool as a cucumber, but the more you pretend to be okay, the more it seems like your anxiety takes over everything.

Befriending our lived experiences can be a life-changing experience because as the saying goes “we cannot tame what we cannot name”.  Anxiety requires us to not just name it but to better understand what is happening for us to take steps to help ourselves navigate it with more ease. Here are a few things to keep in mind when you are facing (or wanting to run from) anxiety.

Anxiety Builds With Avoidance

When I was early in my career and working at an eating disorder clinic, the hallmark statement was “the only thing to avoid is avoiding”, which at first made me laugh because it seemed so obvious.  But as I thought about it, and watched people struggle, the more I realized that sometimes the instinct we feel without anxiety is to either run from it or shut it all down.  After all, when we are feeling something in our bodies or our minds or racing, the last thing we want to do is to sit in those sensations, feelings, and thoughts. 

In fact, the mere thought of that sounds overwhelming, daunting, and potentially miserable.  The idea here isn’t to just sit in the things that are hard and get stuck in them.  The idea is to decrease how we avoid situations or sensations that bring up discomfort.  If we are in a pattern of shutting down or running away from what is hard, we are teaching our brains that we cannot handle what is happening.  And over time, this will actually increase our levels of anxiety because our brain is learning that the best way to cope is to avoid, which does give short-term relief, AND almost always makes the situation get bigger and more overwhelming to approach later on.

Anxiety Is Trying to Be a Signal & Can Serve a Purpose

If we think of our emotions as signals that are trying to guide us then it can feel less overwhelming to consider looking at what the underlying signal may be.  If you are feeling anxious about a presentation to your boss or college class, it is likely that your anxiety is simply trying to communicate that what you are about to do is important and that you care deeply about doing well. This signal can often allow us to carve out the necessary time to do a presentation that will be effective and that we can feel good about.  

Anxiety can also be a signal that what we are about to do may be out of our comfort zone and that we want to feel safe or be treated with kindness. 

When presenting to a boss or in front of our peers, it is normal and natural to want to be viewed in a positive manner, and the fear of not doing well or fear of being judged also surfaces in our anxiety.  Social connection is vital to our emotional well-being, so from an evolutionary standpoint, we need to stay connected to our groups and when our brain fears this may be up for debate, we can often feel anxious about the future or the outcomes. 

Anxiety Is a State of Our Biology or Our Patterns

We all have biological needs and responses to the world around us and the world within us.  When we are tired or overtired- it is our brain's job to be on high alert for any potential threats to our well-being.  It knows we are struggling so it ramps up its efforts to try to see threats or perceived threats even in the absence of actual threats. 

Some brains & nervous systems are built more sensitively than others or have experienced circumstances that reinforce their need to be hypervigilant to perceived or actual threats.  I think most can relate that it is easier to get scared at night when the lights are out than when it’s the middle of the day.  Our bodies can often get stuck in a state of high alert and may send a series of false alerts that make functioning more difficult. Ultimately, we want to explore what the messaging is saying and see if it is falsely linked to something that may be actually safe.   

Anxiety Can Change When We Can Befriend It

To not be stuck in anxiety we need to befriend it. The more we can understand what is happening the easier it will be to know how to get it to slow down.  For example, when I get overtired, I am more likely to overthink or worry about something that would not typically bother me.  When I notice this happening, I try to see what my core fear is at that moment.  Is my brain running in circles because it is trying to solve a problem, and if so what problem is it trying to solve?  Is the problem mine to actually solve or are there aspects that are out of my control?  Is my brain hoping that if it problem is solved well enough, I will feel ”in control “ and bypass uncertainty? 

Our brains really love certainty and predictability, so it makes sense that it wants me to move towards a potential solution to gain more certainty, even when that is not possible. When I can remind myself that I am capable of handling uncertainty, and step into self-soothing, my biology will slow down.  When my biology slows down, my thinking becomes less rigid, less catastrophic, and more grounded.  

Anxiety can often feel like a frenemy, a love-hate sort of relationship. 

Letting go of anxiety can feel scary and in some cases may not be realistic or appropriate.  However, getting our anxiety to only alert us when there is an actual threat we need to attend to is the goal.  And knowing how to respond to it when it is over-firing or on high alert is pivotal to finding peace and having more ease. 

Begin Therapy for Anxiety in Utah

If you feel your anxiety is ruining your peace or that you do not have the tools you need to befriend or approach it, please reach out and get the tools and support you need.  Our team of caring therapists are happy to offer support in Provo, Salt Lake City, and across the state. You can start your therapy journey with Inside Wellness by following these simple steps:

1. Contact us to schedule a free 15-minute consultation call

2. Meet with a caring therapist

3. Start developing a better relationship with your anxiety!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Anxiety treatment isn’t the only service offered with the team at Inside Wellness. This is why our team is happy to offer support with a variety of other services including eating disorders, body image counseling, anxiety treatment, and online Therapy in Utah. Feel free to visit our blog for more helpful information today!

5 Myths or Misconceptions About Eating Disorders

As an eating disorder therapist in Utah, I have heard many opinions, thoughts, and beliefs about what people think eating disorders are and are not, and are filled with many many misconceptions. 

Most of the myths and misconceptions are from stereotypes in the media or from comments made from well-intended, but undereducated beliefs of others.  I say this because I was one of those ill-informed individuals who didn’t know what I didn’t know.  And then 5 years into my career, I had the good fortune of being hired to work at an eating disorder treatment center in Orem, UT and I began to see through the myths I had learned. I’m sharing these because for people to get the help they need, we all need to understand the truths about eating disorders. 

An Eating Disorder Is Not That Serious

When people find out that I am an eating disorder & anxiety therapist, they often make a joke about food or their bodies.  It repeatedly reminds me that as a culture, eating disorders are widely misunderstood, minimized, and hard for people to know how to talk about them. This makes sense because it’s hard to talk about big topics when we don’t understand the complexity or basic truths.  The truth about eating disorders is that they are more prevalent and more serious than most people think.  

At a minimum, someone who has an eating disorder is in a constant battle with themselves and their bodies. 

They are always hearing a critical voice in their head that they should or shouldn’t do x, y, and z with food & exercise.  At worst, they will suffer significant physical complications in the here and now, even if they seem to be engaging in life normally.  I think we can all agree that we lose far too many people to drugs and suicide, but most are shocked to learn that eating disorders have the second highest mortality rate of all mental health conditions only preceded by opioid abuse. And if this is new information to you, you are not alone.  We do not talk about eating disorders enough or with adequate understanding to have this data point as commonplace knowledge, sobering as it may be.   

Eating Disorders Have “A Look”

This is probably the most common misconception that I have heard over the years.  In general, we tend to categorize all things through the lens of our experiences or something we learned one time.  So if you learned that eating disorders only apply to significantly underweight individuals, you are not alone.  I was also surprised when I learned that even in an inpatient treatment facility, the vast majority of my clients did not fit into the false paradigm. Most of my clients “looked normal” as people often say.  And yet these individuals were severely compromised both physically and emotionally due to their eating disorders.

We see this in other areas of mental health as well. 

Most people think that depression is when someone is unable to get out of bed or shower.  And while this certainly can be a symptom of depression, it can also be true that lots of people have significant depression that attend school or work. In both cases, these stereotypes or lack of a broader picture of mental health leads to fewer people seeking treatment.  Reaching out for help can be very hard for many people and if the only mental picture we have is speaking to a narrow demographic then we may feel like we “shouldn't” need help or people often feel guilty seeking help because they believe they aren’t “bad enough” to be in therapy.  I do feel like this tide is turning with anxiety, and other life challenges and I’m hoping that with more education we will see this happen with all mental health struggles. 

Eating Disorders Must Have Extreme Behaviors

While it is true that some individuals with eating disorders are engaging in time-consuming and objectively extreme behaviors, most individuals are covertly engaging in their eating disorders and go unnoticed.  In part, this is because as a culture we have shifted into a widely accepted pattern of disordered eating.  We talk, judge, and change our eating patterns to adhere to the latest trends that are praised or perceived as normal and good.  It is a culture where talking about certain foods in a moralist way or attaching guilt, shame, or praise to the presence or absence of food is so common that we don’t notice when others or even ourselves have internalized the data points. We become trapped in thought & behavioral patterns that can lead us right into a full-blown eating disorder.  

Dieting is often the gateway to an eating disorder, and yet dieting is seen as low risk, high reward, and “normal”. People also assume that if someone is eating then they do not have an eating disorder. Most of my clients can often eat a meal with others in a way that does not raise major red flags, but they cannot eat normally day in & day out without feeling compelled to compensate with over-exercising, restricting, binging & purging. 

Eating Disorders Are a Choice 

This one can seem tricky to both individuals struggling with an eating disorder and to those who love them. Because we all come hardwired to respond to our internal signals to seek out water, food, shelter, and connection it can seem plausible to think that once someone realizes they have an eating disorder if they can just stop worrying about food & their body that they will be able to resume an innate skill to feed themselves.  And trust me, if it was that simple, I’d happily find another career path because that would alleviate so much emotional distress & physical complications that those who suffer from an eating disorder face. 

So many times people who are struggling with an eating disorder have said that to themselves or a loved one in moments of desperation, frustration, or undereducation. They will say “Just eat” or something akin to that……...and like in all other areas of life, if the Nike slogan of  “just do it” worked when spoken aloud, we’d be investing in Nike:)   Unfortunately, it is not that simple.  Once an eating disorder is ignited or activated for an individual, it sets off a chain reaction of thought patterns, beliefs, and behaviors that are very hard to combat.  And while I firmly believe that recovery is possible, it is a process filled with many ups & downs, twists, and turns, and a lot of hard-fought battles.  

Individuals With Eating Disorders Know They Have an Eating Disorder

Many times individuals who are struggling with an eating disorder do not realize that this is what they are experiencing.  And to me, this makes a lot of sense because many of the behaviors that happen during an eating disorder are things that they have been praised for, or that a medical professional has reinforced due to lack of education. 

I hope that this article expands the narrative for you and that if you are struggling with your relationship with your body or food, you will reach out and meet with an eating disorder therapist near you. You may have disordered eating, you may have an eating disorder, or you may have a struggle with how you experience your body.  All of these things can improve with the support of an eating disorder specialist. 

Begin Eating Disorder Treatment in Provo, UT

This is not the full list of misconceptions about eating disorders, but I hope that it expands your viewpoint.  Help is available, and everyone deserves to find relief from the pain that comes with an eating disorder.  Change is possible, and our team of caring therapists would be happy to offer support. Healing is within reach.  Please contact Inside Wellness if you or a loved one needs help by following these simple steps:

1. Reach out and give us a call at 801-699-6161.

2. Learn more about our counseling services and the members of our team.

3. Start better understanding eating disorders so you can overcome them!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

We understand that you may experience other concerns in addition to eating disorders. This is why Inside Wellness offers support with a variety of mental health services. Other services offered include body image counseling, anxiety treatment, and online Therapy in Utah. Feel free to visit our blog for more helpful information today!

Managing Self Expectations & Anxiety in the New Year

You’ve struggled with worry & internalized pressure your entire life. 

You always feel the need to meet but often beat the expectations that are laid out in front of you, even if these expectations are ones you have set for yourself.  There’s a part of you that even thrives off of the expectations or competition of it all.  And yet, you can see, or have been told that sometimes trying to meet these expectations all the time is leaving you riddled with more anxiety, shame, and self blame that is making your mental health worse, not better. You can’t seem to make it all stop, it’s just what you do even if it isn’t working for you without some backlash.  When people tell you to just lower your expectations you feel stuck because you either disagree or have no idea how to put that into practice.  

Here are a few tips from an anxiety therapist to close the gap and reduce the negative impacts of high self-expectations.

Apply the Reasonable Best Rule: 

Anxiety and perfectionism can propel us forward and yet often they can keep us stuck too.  When we fail to live up to the “idea” or “way” we think we should have performed or completed in a certain way or timeframe we can be much harsher with ourselves than we may be with another person.  This is often because we are only looking at the outcomes, not the circumstances that are happening at the time.  We also want to reject anything that can seem like “an excuse” for the way things turned out, and often default to beating ourselves up instead of getting curious about the context.  So what can help you be more kind and curious is looking to see if you did your “reasonable best” meaning. 

If you were watching your life from the perspective of your closest friend, what might they notice? 

How much sleep did you have, what was your stress level like within your self-expectation and with the demands happening at the same time-work, relationships, money, school, anxiety, physical or mental health, etc.   Oftentimes we do an honest accounting of what was happening in all areas of our lives, including our internal world, and we find that we did do what was reasonable for any human being in those circumstances.  This doesn’t mean that we love it or are okay with the outcomes, but that we can soften the negative self-talk by understanding what impacted how things went down.  

Stay in your Lane:

This one can seem so obvious to us at times, and yet I find it’s a constant factor most of us need to be reminded of.  As with driving, if we take our eyes off the road in front of us to look at people in other lanes or locations in life, we can easily crash.  We all make progress or have different aims at different times in our lives.  We are all hardwired differently and when we try to go at the pace or in the direction of others paths, we often feel more overwhelmed, more anxious, more self-critical, and less successful.  One way to manage this temptation to compare and compete can be to ask yourself a few key questions. 

For example:  What if I trusted that my goals and my pace WILL lead me to the life I truly want?  

Am I comparing my points of struggle to other people's points of success, and is this a fair comparison?  Why am I noticing others and wanting to switch lanes?  When we can pose questions with sincere curiosity instead of judgment, we can often see the underlying emotions and needs we are bumping up against.  We likely won’t stop having moments of looking out of our lane, but directing our focus back onto how we can support ourselves in our lane will be time better spent.

Stop, Drop, & Roll:

This is a phrase we all know well because it was repeatedly taught and practiced through all levels of public education to do if you are caught in a fire.  The idea here is that in a crisis we can apply a few steps to slow down the scary event that is happening and get relief & safety.  When anxiety starts to build, it often leads to more anxious thoughts, and noticing anxious symptoms in our body. This in turn increases our desire to run from the proverbial fire, but running often leads to more flames of angst.  So when you notice your anxiety building, sometimes the best thing you can do is break up the pattern. 

Stop what you are doing for a minute:

Do some deep breathing for a minute, or change your scenery, or reach out & talk to someone.  Try to “Drop” the topic of your level of anxiety by slowing down your body & your brain or seeking support to help your anxious thoughts be soothed.  And then “Roll” with it-anxiety will build to a peak point and then it WILL decelerate.  Sometimes we fear anxiety so much that we believe we cannot manage it.  But trying to control it keeps it from moving through and past us.  Emotions are often like waves in the ocean- they build, they peak and they fall away.  We cannot change the wave from existing but we can help our brain & our body in the process.

Begin Therapy for Anxiety in Utah

Anxiety can feel like it is taking over our lives at times. This is why our team is here to help you gain some tools and support and you learn to navigate your emotions. You don’t have to do this alone. You can start your therapy journey with Inside Wellness Counseling by following these simple steps:

1. Schedule a consultation by reaching out or giving us a call at 801-699-6161.

2. Meet with a caring therapists

3. Start or message us on our website

Other Therapy Services Offered with Inside Wellness

We understand that you may experience other concerns in addition to anxiety therapy. This is why Inside Wellness offers support with a variety of mental health services. Other services offered include body image counseling, eating disorders, and online Therapy in Utah. Feel free to visit our blog for more helpful information today!

Are New Year's Resolutions Sinking Your Ship?

You’re headed back to school & the daily routine. 

You’re both excited about the year and what’s to come, and simultaneously you are feeling overwhelmed with all of the ideas in your head that you want to actualize. If only there were enough hours in the day to jump into every area of your life that you want to see yourself progress. 

Your friends, family & classmates are buzzing with all of their New Year's Resolutions they want to accomplish and despite yourself, you end up wanting to jump on those bandwagons too and do e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g!  There’s an energy in the air that feels inspiring, encouraging, and full of hope.  But as you start to settle into doing school & work on top of everything else and suddenly you feel like you are drowning in a sea of to-do’s that may be impossible to accomplish and still stay sane.  But you’re unwilling to jump ship on your aims, so how can you temper them enough to balance everything and still have a life?  

Here are three tips to consider to help you strive for excellence while stepping out of the anxiety loop & perfectionism:

It’s Okay to Pivot:

New Year's Resolutions can be a time to reflect, consider, and look ahead.  But in the high energy of the season & the chatter, we can often jump into the deep end of the pool of dreams or goals. Or we get caught up in the excitement and choose WAY too many things to feel successful in our attempts without being super rigid, super anxious, or neglecting key factors of physical or emotional wellness (such as sleep, connection, etc). 

It is so tempting to stick to the course we outlined or declared as our goals for the year.  We fear that if we change our minds, our stance, or our goals we will be judged or looked down upon. Most often the fear of judgment does not actually turn into a reality.  Most people are great at respecting our decisions to change our minds.   Oftentimes when we state what pivot we are making, those around us will just roll with it and may even admit that they have changed courses as well.  It’s human nature to get part way down a path and realize it’s in our best interest to pivot to a modified or different course altogether.

Consider Choosing a Theme or a Word: 

Sometimes it is easier to choose a word or a theme for the year that you are striving towards.  This approach will often lead to more flexibility while continuing to move forward in learning and growth.  This also helps when competing goals bump up against each other, this approach gives us direction vs specificity.  Maybe your anxiety propels you into avoidance on a regular basis and you are tired of feeling held hostage. 

You may choose a word such as “Approach” because anxiety will go down when we approach the subject we want so much to avoid. Or maybe you could choose something to help you feel more resilient in the face of anxiety and you choose the word “Rest & Play” because you’re anxiety propels you into overdrive and excessive action and you struggle to slow down and rest or you have a hard time giving yourself permission to take a break and have fun on a regular basis. 

This approach orients us towards something that when considered over time, will allow us to integrate a new perspective or approach to improve the quality of our life or well-being.  Gradual change is often the change that tends to stick!

One Thing At a Time:

This may not be the most popular approach, but it can still move the needle forward in your life without causing unnecessary anxiety or unrealistic expectations.  Choose one thing to focus on for a set length of time, for example, maybe you need to be more focused on school.  You might set an aim to spend x amount of time at the library this semester instead of studying at home because you’ve realized you don’t focus as well at your apartment. Or you may realize that you can get so deep into studying that your anxiety spins you out and you lose the ability to have fun and be relaxed.

So, you may opt to limit your homework time and put boundaries about when you will not do your homework,-maybe you will take part or all of the weekend off from studying and spend it doing things that increase connection & joy in your life.  Either way, you choose an aim or goal for a specific length of time, and then when the time frame is up, you choose another time frame and another aim that will help you create growth. 

Begin Therapy for Anxiety in Salt Lake City, UT

If you find that you struggle to let things go or if you get rigid or frustrated when you can’t execute in the way you want to, help is available. Our team of therapists would be honored to support you. You don’t have to live in your anxiety, self-judgment, and in a constant state of distress. Help is available, high functioning anxiety is our jam. You can start your therapy journey with Inside Wellness by following these simple steps:

1. Call or message us today at 801-699-6161.

2. Learn more about our services and our team.

3. Start finding the right therapeutic fit for you!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Our team understands you may experience a number of mental health concerns in addition to anxiety treatment. This is why we are happy to offer support with a variety of mental health services including body image counseling, eating disorder therapy, and online Therapy in Utah.

Tips From an Eating Disorder Therapist in Provo, UT to Navigate Thanksgiving

You are almost packed and ready to get out of college town or work to get a break for a few days.

Once you are settled into your car or on the plane your mind starts to calm, until you realize how this holiday will likely go down.  Dread and fear come racing in equal proportion.  You are scared to fall back into old patterns or to deal with family members who inevitably say all the wrong things and suddenly you’re eating disorder thoughts are front and center.  You fear that the hard-fought progress you have made in your eating recovery journey will go out the window.  

Feeling overwhelmed and fearful is completely understandable.  You’ve been there before and are steeped in guilt and shame about food and your body is a place you don’t want to live. 

Here are a few tips that an eating disorder therapist wants you to keep in mind this holiday:

Go Back to the Start- one meal and one day at a time.  

When we think of a long weekend, at first it sounds exciting, but it can also feel so LONG and OVERWHELMING to think about all of the meals and all of the options. Recovery has always been a one-day-at-a-time thing, especially in the early days of your recovery.   So let’s go back to those basics.  Not one meal, one snack, one day, or even one weekend is going to make or break your recovery.  Take a moment and just breathe in this truth.

Try to do the opposite of what your eating disorder wants you to do: 

Coping with crazy comments….aka diet culture palooza.  Thanksgiving can be extra tricky because it seems like even people who do not normally comment on food or bodies frequently make quips and comments on Thanksgiving.  Unfortunately, the cultural norm adds a side dish of both guilt and shame to the Thanksgiving menu in most households.  It is understandable that these comments are going to throw you off balance.  Your eating disorder is more than capable of giving you an onslaught of unsolicited feedback and fears about this day & weekend, so hearing it from others takes your distress to a whole new level. 

Logically you know this is going to happen but it still feels like a force of nature when you hear it.  In these moments, picture your treatment team & your future self encouraging you to fight those comments and defy the eating disorder by eating what sounds good to you, and what your dietician has encouraged you to eat.  It may not go perfectly, but you can get through this meal and this day.

Have a friend or family member on standby for support. 

This one can be super helpful because fighting an eating disorder is a full-time job in and of itself, and doing it without support, especially for this holiday, is extra tough.  Talk to the family member or friend in advance.  Let them know what you think will be the hardest parts of the day.  Share what comments others may say that will trigger your strongest ED thoughts, and let them know how they can help you with those comments.  Let them know if there is a way they can help you logistically with the overwhelm of food choices.  

Sometimes following someone’s lead (who has a good relationship with food) can help reduce the anxiety of trying to determine what is normal amount and variety so that you don’t get in your head from the very start.   Have a code word to say if you need help or an emoji you can text that will let them know you need some emotional and or logistical support.  There is no shame in this, I think this is the hardest day of the year for individuals in recovery.

Be Gentle with Yourself. 

Give yourself some compassion, try to encourage yourself in the way you would a good friend.  If the day goes better than you planned-awesome! If it’s harder than you predicted, think of what kind words you would say to a friend who is in recovery as well.  Would you be harsh, or would you admit it wasn’t their best day in recovery while encouraging them to go easy on themselves? We all know this answer, you have a warm and compassionate heart, and you would undoubtedly be gentle and loving with them. 

Your body is your friend.

It is capable of handling the amount and variety of foods you will be eating this week.  You do not need to compensate for your eating and your body will remain the same shape and size it is right now.  Breathe in self-trust, breathe out the fear.  Your treatment team trusts you, your body trusts you, and you can trust you. This is one week of your life, and nothing can make or break your recovery in this short amount of time.  You’ve got this, and even if you don’t, we’ve got you!

Begin Working With an Eating Disorder Therapist

If you feel you need more help we are happy to help. You can contact our team of caring therapists for support with navigating the challenges of eating disorders. You can receive support from our Salt Lake City-based practice and across Utah. Start your therapy journey with Inside Wellness by following these simple steps;

1. Schedule an appointment or give us a call 801-699-6161.

2. Learn more about the members of our team.

3. Start enjoying the holiday season!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

We know that you may experience other concerns in addition to eating disorders. This is why Inside Wellness offers support with a variety of mental health services. Other services include body image counseling, anxiety treatment, and online Therapy in Utah. You can also visit our blog for more helpful information today!

How to Keep Your Anxiety From Getting the Best of You During the Holidays

Let’s face it, the holidays are chaotic and rarely go as planned.

Life feels extra overwhelming, busy, and out of control, so it’s easy to go into overdrive. Oftentimes when we go into overdrive we swing into over-control mode or we put our heads in the sand hoping it will all just go away, or both! If you pull towards the over-control side of life, then this blog is for you:)  While being in overdrive seems like “structure“ to us initially. It can leave us feeling more rigid, and more stressed and leaves our relationships in shambles as we try to “help” others and ourselves get through the holidays our way.  While we call it structure, our family may feel like our approach is frustrating at best. The more we over-control the more rigid we get and the more resistant we are to change & allowing for spontaneity and connection.

Here are a few tips to help combat the trenches of rigidity, even though it helps you feel a false sense of control.  

1) Recognize which camp you tend to jump into when life gets crazy.

Everyone has a different response to anxiety, stress, and overwhelm. However, over-control plays out very differently than avoidance.  Overcontrol can look like wanting things to be in a very specific fashion or manner in order to feel like they will “get done“. Or specific attempts or ways to make things feel more “manageable. However, in these attempts, our thoughts and behaviors narrow and we are less open to new ways of being flexible. We feel and present as being rigid about how things should (air quotes) go down.

2) Recognize the intention behind your actions.

Your heart is in the right place, you just want everything to go smoothly and turn out well. You are striving for a sense of calmness, peace, or a sense of capability. Wanting to feel calm, peaceful, and capable are all good things.  However, gone unchecked or without flexibility these good aims turn into mandates or unrealistic expectations for yourself and others. Your good intentions and talent too far may backfire on you.   Remind yourself that you are capable of handling windows of ambiguity and higher stress levels even though you hate how it feels. 

3)Losing your grip, this one seems counterintuitive, because when we are feeling out of control, what we want to do is to double down and increase the rules and structure, but this feels safer to us. 

This is often where perfectionism creeps in. It also allows for very little room for margin. And let’s face it things never go as planned, and when this happens we become more emotionally upset. When get rigid when we have a specific idea in our head of how it should go or how a timeline should happen. We can loosen our grip and have more flexibility in our expectations.  Flexibility can often help us find enjoyment and happiness when things turn out differently than expected.

4) There is a difference between being in charge and in control.

We often think that being in control is what will ensure a good outcome. This is actually a false sense of reality because there are very few things we can actually control. However, being in charge shifts the focus.  We can choose to do things to help us regulate our mood and adapt our expectations. Over-control leads us to micromanage the circumstances so that everything goes according to our plan, being in charge of ourselves allows for flexibility, other opinions and approaches, and occasionally an unexpectedly great outcome. After all, the aim is to have a fun-filled holiday season. 

My favorite childhood Christmas Eve memory came from this very concept.  A turn of events led to the traditional meal being foiled.  So we pivoted, and in that pivot, we created a memory that lasted far longer than any other.  We ended up eating Pizza Hut by candlelight, a far cry from my mom’s vision of how that night would go. But it was filled with laughter, imperfection, and connection.  Three things you can embrace and enjoy when you can allow yourself to let go of what should be and lean into what is happening in the moment.  

So when the over-control urges kick in, and they almost always do during times of high stress, you can do your best to see them for what they are. You can identify your core desires for you and your family to have the best experiences and then be open to the idea that some of the best experiences in life are the ones that turn out differently than we expected. Because different can also be so, so good!

Begin Therapy for Anxiety in Salt Lake City, UT

If you feel like your anxiety hijacks your holidays or your mood, reach out for help.  We will happily talk to you about your needs, questions, and concerns from our Salt Lake City-based practice. You can receive remote addressing anxiety symptoms from our team of caring therapists by following these simple steps:

1. Contact us to schedule a free 15-minute consultation call

2. Meet with a caring therapist

3. Start making the most of your holiday!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

We understand that you may experience more than one mental health concern at a time. This is why our team is happy to offer support with a variety of services in addition to anxiety treatment. These services include eating disorders, body image counseling, anxiety treatment, and online Therapy in Utah. Feel free to visit our blog for more helpful information today!

Unmasking Diet Culture: How It Impacts Eating Disorders

In a world that places immense value on appearance and body size, it's no surprise that diet culture has taken hold.

Diet culture refers to the societal obsession with thinness, weight loss, and the belief that one's worth is determined by their body size. While its intentions might seem innocent, diet culture has profound effects, especially on individuals already vulnerable to eating disorders. As a certified eating disorder specialist who advocates for the Health At Every Size (HAES) approach, I want to shed some light on what diet culture truly is and how it profoundly influences those struggling with eating disorders.

Defining Diet Culture

Diet culture encompasses a wide range of beliefs, practices, and societal norms that promote the pursuit of weight loss as a means to achieve happiness, success, and self-worth. It glorifies thinness as the ideal body type, perpetuates negative body image, and prescribes rigid eating and exercise routines as a way to achieve this ideal. It's important to understand that diet culture extends far beyond dieting; it includes the subtle messages embedded in media, and everyday conversations that reinforce the notion that thinness equals beauty and happiness.

4 Ways Diet Culture Impacts 

• Fueling Disordered Eating Behaviors: Diet culture often leads individuals down a slippery slope of disordered eating behaviors. The relentless pursuit of weight loss can trigger restrictive eating, excessive exercise, and a preoccupation with food. For those already genetically predisposed to eating disorders, these behaviors can easily escalate into full-blown eating disorders. 

• Perpetuating Body Dissatisfaction: Diet culture thrives on promoting dissatisfaction with one's body, implying that it's never good enough as it is. This constant dissatisfaction can contribute to body dysmorphia and a negative body image, creating fertile ground for eating disorders to take root.

• Creating an Emotional Roller Coaster: The promises of diet culture are often tied to achieving happiness and self-worth through weight loss. However, when these goals aren't met, individuals can experience feelings of failure, shame, and low self-esteem. These emotional ups and downs can exacerbate underlying mental health issues and lead to the development of eating disorders.

• Distorting Perceptions of Health: Diet culture wrongly equates health with a specific body size. It ignores the complex interplay of genetics, lifestyle, socioeconomic factors, and mental health in determining overall well-being. 

The HAES Approach as an Alternative

The Health At Every Size (HAES) approach is a paradigm shift from diet culture. It recognizes that health is multifaceted and includes physical, emotional, and mental well-being. HAES rejects the idea that everyone must conform to a certain body standard and emphasizes that people of all sizes deserve respect, support, and access to health-promoting resources.

• Embracing Body Diversity: HAES celebrates the diversity of body sizes and shapes. It acknowledges that health can be achieved at various sizes and that individuals should not be judged solely based on their appearance.

• Promoting Intuitive Eating: Instead of adhering to rigid diets, HAES encourages intuitive eating – listening to one's body cues to guide eating choices. This approach allows individuals to reconnect with their bodies and honor their hunger, fullness, and cravings without guilt.

• Focusing on Well-being: HAES shifts the focus from weight loss to overall well-being. It promotes physical activity that brings joy, self-care, and mental wellness as essential components of a healthy life.

• Challenging Societal Norms: HAES challenges societal norms that equate body shape & size with worthiness. By advocating for body diversity and deconstructing the system of oppression, both health and well-being are more likely to improve.

Diet culture's influence is far-reaching and insidious, particularly for individuals vulnerable to eating disorders. Recognizing the damaging impact of diet culture is essential in providing effective support and treatment for those struggling.

Begin Eating Disorder Treatment in Salt Lake City, UT

As certified eating disorder specialists and advocates of the Health At Every Size approach, our goal is to empower individuals to break free from the confines of diet culture and embrace a holistic view of health and self-worth. By challenging these harmful beliefs and adopting a compassionate, inclusive approach, we can foster a healthier relationship with food, body image, and overall well-being. You can start your therapy journey with Inside Wellness by following these simple steps:

1. Reach out to us about scheduling a free 15-minute phone consultation.

2. Learn more about our services and our team.

3. Start finding the right therapeutic fit for you!

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

Our team understands you may experience a number of mental health concerns in addition to eating disorders. This is why we are happy to offer support with a variety of mental health services including body image counseling, anxiety therapy, and online Therapy in Utah.

An Online Therapist in Utah Shares Tips on Opening up With a Virtual Therapist

Let’s face it, once the pandemic hit and online everything became the norm, our world was forever changed. 

Our culture changed in terms of offering many long-term shifts, such as hybrid or work-from-home jobs now becoming the norm. And while universities, entertainment, and many industries resumed pre-pandemic business as usual (thankfully), other areas of life now allow us to choose how to spend our time.  If you want to see your doctor or a therapist virtually, you almost always can.  It has been our experience that while many people initially requested in-person therapy appointments during the past year or two, many pivoted back to virtual appointments because of the ease & time-saving benefits.  So we thought we’d share a few ideas on helping you know how to connect with your counselor, therapist, or medical provider with ease.

Don’t Overthink It:

Haha, easier said than done, right?  Typically overthinking a few things is normal, and tends to happen when we are new to doing something or meeting someone.  Given that mental health is so personal and can feel so vulnerable we find that the initial session is the most anxiety-provoking.  While this may be your first introduction to virtual therapy, or simply just to this specific provider, it is not new for the person you are seeing.  They have been doing virtual sessions since, and sometimes even before the pandemic changed how we do things.  They should be skilled and able to help you feel at ease upon meeting them. This is actually a part of what you want to be looking for in general because therapy can be vulnerable and a little uncomfortable at times, so connecting with a provider who puts you at ease is essential.  

Comfortable Setting: 

Choose a location that best suits you and makes you feel at home so to speak. For some people, that is literally at home in your joggers & comfy tee shirt in your favorite chair.  For others, they may opt to do therapy from in their car because it is often their second home and they are free from the listening ears of roommates or family members.  And occasionally people do sessions from their office setting or an empty classroom on campus.  

Choose a Private Setting:  

This one can sometimes be obvious if you tend to be more private by nature, but often times it is overlooked.  If you tend to be more of an open book, then you may be comfortable being in a more public place and feel okay if others may hear part of what you are sharing. While where you choose to have a session is ultimately up to you, we would still strongly encourage you to have full privacy from start to finish.  We want you to feel free to share the full extent of your lived experiences and your feelings when they surface, and we’ve observed that if your roommates might be able to hear parts of what you are sharing or if you are watching the door of your classroom to make sure no one enters, it’s often time to settle into your feelings and experiences at a meaningful level.  You can consider wearing headphones or earbuds if you feel your privacy may be interrupted as a safety measure, however, the best bet is full privacy in a room or location where no one can listen in or interrupt you.

Talk It Out:  

Your counselor’s job is to help ensure that therapy is both beneficial to you and that the virtual platform is a good fit for you as well. Some people have reported that being in their home environment has made it easier to open up than being in an office setting.  There is some research that suggests that we do lose some inhibition when in a virtual setting faster than we may in person.  However, it is not a great fit for all. If you are finding it hard to connect or if you simply don’t like this approach, tell your therapist immediately.  Together you can determine if there are things that can be done to improve the experience, or if you simply need to be connected to a therapist who sees you in person. 

Your therapist should be willing to help you find a specialist who can see you in person and help you make that transition on a timeline that works for you.  A good therapist will always want you to do what is very best for you!  So if you have any worries or guilt, know that we are behind you and want you to get what YOU need, even when that is not working with us. If you are having tech difficulties, speak up immediately. A good internet connection is a must, so let us know so we can troubleshoot those immediately.  While it is the provider's job to supply a HIPPA-compliant platform for your privacy, you will need to ensure you are connected to a secure internet network or streaming service. If you have questions or concerns about this, talk it out with your counselor as she/he/they should know what guidelines are best on this front.  

Begin Working with An Online Therapist in Salt Lake City, UT

If you have questions if online therapy is a good fit for you, don’t hesitate to reach out.  We will happily talk to you about your needs, questions, and concerns from our Salt Lake City-based practice. You can receive remote support from our team of caring therapists by following these simple steps:

1. Contact us to schedule a free 15-minute consultation call

2. Meet with a caring therapist

3. Start addressing the concerns affecting you most

Other Services Offered with Inside Wellness

We understand that you may experience more than one mental health concern at a time. This is why our team is happy to offer support with a variety of services including eating disorders, body image counseling, anxiety treatment, and online Therapy in Utah. Feel free to visit our blog for more helpful information today!